Hey all, the shite finally hit the fan.

jasonrann

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I will pour part of my roadie out the next time I pass your home place in Oyens.

But seriously, we all need wake up calls sometimes. Best of luck to you, you got this.
If you're rolling through Oyens and see a black Audi or White Honda in the driveway and don't stop, we are going to have issues. Take care, good sir!
 
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nolesincebirth

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I don’t drink regularly but when I drink, I drink. I could easily not drink but I’m not sure how social situations get handled.

EVERY social event I’m involved with involves alcohol. And people look to me as the drink guy. I’m always making various drinks for people. People come to my house for drinks. I’d have no issue not drinking but I think others would be weird about me not drinking with them. That’s what I can’t wrap my mind around. How does one stop drinking yet maintain the same social life? Or do you sever those ties?
 
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nolesincebirth

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Also, I’ve posted this before but for those that want the FEEL of drinking but totally non-alcoholic, try these:


images


hoplark / hoptea. They’re kinda pricey, about the same as a craft beer. But they taste like sn IPA and are calorie free, gluten free, and non-alcohol.
 
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jasonrann

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I don’t drink regularly but when I drink, I drink. I could easily not drink but I’m not sure how social situations get handled.

EVERY social event I’m involved with involves alcohol. And people look to me as the drink guy. I’m always making various drinks for people. People come to my house for drinks. I’d have no issue not drinking but I think others would be weird about me not drinking with them. That’s what I can’t wrap my mind around. How does one stop drinking yet maintain the same social life? Or do you sever those ties?
This has been one of my biggest challenges. Instead of getting together with friends and not drinking, I isolated myself at home and drank. I am done with that system. I have reached out to probably 40 or so people since yesterday trying to reconnect. It has to be the better way.
 

jasonrann

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Also, I’ve posted this before but for those that want the FEEL of drinking but totally non-alcoholic, try these:


images


hoplark / hoptea. They’re kinda pricey, about the same as a craft beer. But they taste like sn IPA and are calorie free, gluten free, and non-alcohol.
Thank you for this, going to give it a whirl!
 
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nolesincebirth

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Terribly hard day, folks. Moved from my buddy's to my brother's tonight. I just want to be home. I miss my family so much. I went to my AA meeting today and that helped, but I don't think I have ever felt this alone.
One day at a time. keep fighting the fight.

Are you talking to your family?

Remember, this loneliness is temporary. Chose poorly and it could be your permanent. Don’t make the wrong choice.
 

Moral

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Terribly hard day, folks. Moved from my buddy's to my brother's tonight. I just want to be home. I miss my family so much. I went to my AA meeting today and that helped, but I don't think I have ever felt this alone.

Damn man, I am sorry you are feeling so down. Just keep making the good decisions and get to your new normal with the family.

It is kind of funny, but recently when I was super super down I put on Walk Hard. Damn good movie. Hang in there.
 

jasonrann

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Damn man, I am sorry you are feeling so down. Just keep making the good decisions and get to your new normal with the family.

It is kind of funny, but recently when I was super super down I put on Walk Hard. Damn good movie. Hang in there.
Thanks, man. I appreciate your kind words. My brother goes to bed at 630 pm because he leaves for work at 2 am, I am bored out of my mind. At least I have anxiety meds that are helping a little bit.
 
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NoleinATL

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Thank you for this, going to give it a whirl!


Wish you all the best on your journey jasonrann and hope that you take the positivity of this thread ( for the most part) as a sign you are not alone and people really do hope for the best outcome.

As to the nonalcoholic beer or any other NA option and giving it a whirl, put some distance between that last drink and the first nonalcoholic drink.
This is purely anecdotal, but I have a good friend who hit bottom hard ( lost wife, custody, and a good amount of cash)

After a stint in rehab, getting back to work, and reconnecting Paul had made a comeback so he decided he could handle being a "social" drinker, which turned into a huge failure.

Rehab again, on the wagon 100% etc, but just hated not being "social" so he started drinking nonalcoholic beers. Sadly, the "taste" without the feeling lead Paul to go home one night and pound at least two handles of vodka ( the place was a wreck so not sure how much he drank) and ended up in the hospital where he stayed for 3 weeks and almost died twice.


sorry for the long post, but make damn sure your brain is ready for anything that may push you back to the brink of "feeling" you can handle a drink
 

Hawki97

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Wish you all the best on your journey jasonrann and hope that you take the positivity of this thread ( for the most part) as a sign you are not alone and people really do hope for the best outcome.

As to the nonalcoholic beer or any other NA option and giving it a whirl, put some distance between that last drink and the first nonalcoholic drink.
This is purely anecdotal, but I have a good friend who hit bottom hard ( lost wife, custody, and a good amount of cash)

After a stint in rehab, getting back to work, and reconnecting Paul had made a comeback so he decided he could handle being a "social" drinker, which turned into a huge failure.

Rehab again, on the wagon 100% etc, but just hated not being "social" so he started drinking nonalcoholic beers. Sadly, the "taste" without the feeling lead Paul to go home one night and pound at least two handles of vodka ( the place was a wreck so not sure how much he drank) and ended up in the hospital where he stayed for 3 weeks and almost died twice.


sorry for the long post, but make damn sure your brain is ready for anything that may push you back to the brink of "feeling" you can handle a drink

Jesus Christ. I love beer. Like actually like the taste of it. I wonder if that’s a bad thing. Then I hear stories like this which are literally an impossibility for me to “achieve.” How the eff do people get to this point?!?!
 

ConvenientParking

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Wish you all the best on your journey jasonrann and hope that you take the positivity of this thread ( for the most part) as a sign you are not alone and people really do hope for the best outcome.

As to the nonalcoholic beer or any other NA option and giving it a whirl, put some distance between that last drink and the first nonalcoholic drink.
This is purely anecdotal, but I have a good friend who hit bottom hard ( lost wife, custody, and a good amount of cash)

After a stint in rehab, getting back to work, and reconnecting Paul had made a comeback so he decided he could handle being a "social" drinker, which turned into a huge failure.

Rehab again, on the wagon 100% etc, but just hated not being "social" so he started drinking nonalcoholic beers. Sadly, the "taste" without the feeling lead Paul to go home one night and pound at least two handles of vodka ( the place was a wreck so not sure how much he drank) and ended up in the hospital where he stayed for 3 weeks and almost died twice.


sorry for the long post, but make damn sure your brain is ready for anything that may push you back to the brink of "feeling" you can handle a drink

I tend to agree with putting off near beer. Just personal experience. I went cold turkey for a brief period in mid 2010s and came back hard starting with getting ODouls Amber to have while grilling a steak.
 

hawkbirch

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Terribly hard day, folks. Moved from my buddy's to my brother's tonight. I just want to be home. I miss my family so much. I went to my AA meeting today and that helped, but I don't think I have ever felt this alone.
It was a terribly hard day but here you are still sober, still breathing and still fighting. That takes courage and strength. Very few things that are worth having come easily. You are worth the effort so don't get too down.
 

bhawk24bob

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Jul 8, 2001
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Terribly hard day, folks. Moved from my buddy's to my brother's tonight. I just want to be home. I miss my family so much. I went to my AA meeting today and that helped, but I don't think I have ever felt this alone.

Focus on what's in front of you that you can control, not what you want to be in front of you that you aren't in control of yet. You'll get there, the people in your life that care about you will help you get there. So, be thankful that you have your brother and focus on using his generosity to get to the next step. You're going to have a series of these steps and you can't miss one
 
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Moral

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I tend to agree with putting off near beer. Just personal experience. I went cold turkey for a brief period in mid 2010s and came back hard starting with getting ODouls Amber to have while grilling a steak.

I also went from sober to near beer to raging out hard. Eff NA beer.
 

Hawk_82

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Sep 17, 2006
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With my boozing. I just spent 5 days in the hospital after a big weekend run with my old college buddy. My heart went out of rhythm again and this time it was really bad. I haven't been that scared ever. I am out and sober, but wifey (no pic) is none too happy with me, justifiably so. I am staying with a good friend and going to daily meetings, but good thoughts would be appreciated. I know I am an a-hole, but I really feel like one now. I hope to be back with the family in a week or so.

God bless.
Do you consider yourself an alcoholic? Is alcohol the cause of the problem, or is the alcohol a symptom of the problem? For the record, it sounds like you need to stop drinking regardless of your answer.

But I also know that frequent alcohol use and binge drinking can progress as a way to make yourself sedated. Its a small way to escape reality and make life easier to deal with.

I cant imagine having a 1 year old at 52. I personally had a cranky baby. Its a weird feeling knowing that kid is your son, and yet part of you hates their crankiness. Its a weird dilemma because its not really socially acceptable to talk about these struggles.

I also know the toll having a baby can take on a relationship. i also know that post pardom depression can happen to the man or women .

I bring this up because your success with alcohol likely depends on recognizing the underlying problem.

Hang in there! You have a lot of people here who genuinely want to see tou get better.
 

jasonrann

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Apr 11, 2007
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Wish you all the best on your journey jasonrann and hope that you take the positivity of this thread ( for the most part) as a sign you are not alone and people really do hope for the best outcome.

As to the nonalcoholic beer or any other NA option and giving it a whirl, put some distance between that last drink and the first nonalcoholic drink.
This is purely anecdotal, but I have a good friend who hit bottom hard ( lost wife, custody, and a good amount of cash)

After a stint in rehab, getting back to work, and reconnecting Paul had made a comeback so he decided he could handle being a "social" drinker, which turned into a huge failure.

Rehab again, on the wagon 100% etc, but just hated not being "social" so he started drinking nonalcoholic beers. Sadly, the "taste" without the feeling lead Paul to go home one night and pound at least two handles of vodka ( the place was a wreck so not sure how much he drank) and ended up in the hospital where he stayed for 3 weeks and almost died twice.


sorry for the long post, but make damn sure your brain is ready for anything that may push you back to the brink of "feeling" you can handle a drink
Thank you, brother. Pretty certain the answer for me at this point is avoid all of it.
 

jasonrann

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It was a terribly hard day but here you are still sober, still breathing and still fighting. That takes courage and strength. Very few things that are worth having come easily. You are worth the effort so don't get too down.
Another day looking at the flowers from the top instead of the bottom as my dad would say. I keep going. I made the 4:00 meeting yesterday and am going at 6:00 today. In addition to those regular meetings, I start an outpatient program a week from Monday. Thanks, Birch!
 

jasonrann

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Do you consider yourself an alcoholic? Is alcohol the cause of the problem, or is the alcohol a symptom of the problem? For the record, it sounds like you need to stop drinking regardless of your answer.

But I also know that frequent alcohol use and binge drinking can progress as a way to make yourself sedated. Its a small way to escape reality and make life easier to deal with.

I cant imagine having a 1 year old at 52. I personally had a cranky baby. Its a weird feeling knowing that kid is your son, and yet part of you hates their crankiness. Its a weird dilemma because its not really socially acceptable to talk about these struggles.

I also know the toll having a baby can take on a relationship. i also know that post pardom depression can happen to the man or women .

I bring this up because your success with alcohol likely depends on recognizing the underlying problem.

Hang in there! You have a lot of people here who genuinely want to see tou get better.
I started drinking every day about four years ago when our daughter was two. It turned in a bad way when I started staying up after they went to bed and would drink. Bad idea. Then quantities became more and more. Up until then, I had NEVER had a problem being a couple beers/week person. Wife (no pic) finally called me on it late last year. I have been trying to get my arms around it since then. Our relationship revolves around the kids and work and has been that way for a while.

I feel like if I continue to not drink, I can regain some measure of control and discipline that will help me in other areas as well.
 

hawkbirch

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Another day looking at the flowers from the top instead of the bottom as my dad would say. I keep going. I made the 4:00 meeting yesterday and am going at 6:00 today. In addition to those regular meetings, I start an outpatient program a week from Monday. Thanks, Birch!
I believe in you and will always offer you any support and encouragement I can. You are good people and deserve to be healthy!
 

noleclone2

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May 4, 2015
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I started drinking every day about four years ago when our daughter was two. It turned in a bad way when I started staying up after they went to bed and would drink. Bad idea. Then quantities became more and more. Up until then, I had NEVER had a problem being a couple beers/week person. Wife (no pic) finally called me on it late last year. I have been trying to get my arms around it since then. Our relationship revolves around the kids and work and has been that way for a while.

I feel like if I continue to not drink, I can regain some measure of control and discipline that will help me in other areas as well.
Sounds like you were, like most, a functioning alcoholic still managing to get by at work and at home despite this massive time and money and brain sucker. You are for sure going to see massive results in other areas, most quickly in your mental acumen which I suspect was majorly dampened resulting in a life of constantly forgetting personal and work tasks you were committed to do. You will be seeing that come back slow and steady next two months and feel like a new man.
 
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HawkCapt1912

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Oct 3, 2001
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Former DBQer in WDM
Do you consider yourself an alcoholic? Is alcohol the cause of the problem, or is the alcohol a symptom of the problem? For the record, it sounds like you need to stop drinking regardless of your answer.

But I also know that frequent alcohol use and binge drinking can progress as a way to make yourself sedated. Its a small way to escape reality and make life easier to deal with.

I cant imagine having a 1 year old at 52. I personally had a cranky baby. Its a weird feeling knowing that kid is your son, and yet part of you hates their crankiness. Its a weird dilemma because its not really socially acceptable to talk about these struggles.

I also know the toll having a baby can take on a relationship. i also know that post pardom depression can happen to the man or women .

I bring this up because your success with alcohol likely depends on recognizing the underlying problem.

Hang in there! You have a lot of people here who genuinely want to see tou get better.
Alcohol is generally the answer/medication to the problem. It is a means to escape, if only momentarily.
 
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jasonrann

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Today is the beginning of week four of my being out of the house. Wife (no pic) and the kids were gone this weekend. I stayed at the house to help out with a few things. Bad idea. They get back tomorrow so I am going to go back to my buddy's place. Wife and I are meeting on Thursday to talk. Thoughts, prayers, love and whatever the hell else is deeply needed. If I lose them, I won’t last.
 

coloradonoles

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Mar 29, 2002
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Houston, TX
Today is the beginning of week four of my being out of the house. Wife (no pic) and the kids were gone this weekend. I stayed at the house to help out with a few things. Bad idea. They get back tomorrow so I am going to go back to my buddy's place. Wife and I are meeting on Thursday to talk. Thoughts, prayers, love and whatever the hell else is deeply needed. If I lose them, I won’t last.
Dang... don't know how I missed this thread...

You still got my number? If you need anything, just let me know.

Best of luck. I haven't had more than 10 beers in the last 4 years. Not because I wanted/needed to quit... just life took over. I don't miss it and you won't either. One day at a time...
 
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jasonrann

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Dang... don't know how I missed this thread...

You still got my number? If you need anything, just let me know.

Best of luck. I haven't had more than 10 beers in the last 4 years. Not because I wanted/needed to quit... just life took over. I don't miss it and you won't either. One day at a time...
Thank you, brother. I really appreciate it. I don't think I have your number anymore, please text me, 816.510.7410.
 

Bro D

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Head up brother. Once your habits change, your outlook will too. Best of luck.. I have a feeling that everything will work out for you
 

goldmom

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Thanks for all the help, y'all. No drankin' and I made the AA 4:00 pm yesterday and will be doing the same today. I am very thankful for all of you.
Good stuff JR and seriously I think everyone is in your corner.
Free pats on the back, unlimited high fives, and a kick in the butt as needed.
❤️
 

goldmom

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Also, I’ve posted this before but for those that want the FEEL of drinking but totally non-alcoholic, try these:


images


hoplark / hoptea. They’re kinda pricey, about the same as a craft beer. But they taste like sn IPA and are calorie free, gluten free, and non-alcohol.
Who carries those?
 

Tenacious E

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Thank you, brother. I really appreciate it. I don't think I have your number anymore, please text me, 816.510.7410.
Glad to hear things are going well for you. I have turned over a new leaf working out (I know I know, a recurring theme which has not had proper follow through over the past few years). Had a couple of wake up calls on a recent trip in being utterly exhausted and put to shame on a failed "mountain" hike with with 1,280 feet of climb over 1.2 miles, and how I was looking in pictures. Driven home by Bill Maher's recent query: how many fat 90-year olds have you seen? As I close out the latter portion of my 40s, the motivation runs deep to stick around for whatever comes next and down the road. It's only been a week or so, but I have scaled back the alcohol, stuck to a diet, and rediscovered how easy elliptical trainers are on the knees so I am hitting that pretty hard. csb
 
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Moral

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Today is the beginning of week four of my being out of the house. Wife (no pic) and the kids were gone this weekend. I stayed at the house to help out with a few things. Bad idea. They get back tomorrow so I am going to go back to my buddy's place. Wife and I are meeting on Thursday to talk. Thoughts, prayers, love and whatever the hell else is deeply needed. If I lose them, I won’t last.

I can sense your hopelessness from here my man. It’s a hard place to be for sure, it took me three tries to successfully call a crisis line at one point, and if I learned anything from it is that you don’t have to battle alone. If you don’t have a therapist, I would get one. Hope I don’t seem pushy on it, but mental health is the real deal. I very much recommend.

And no matter what transpires those kids will still be around so you must last and makes the good choices. Stay strong, better days are ahead.
 

SoDakHawk

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Sep 14, 2006
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I don’t drink regularly but when I drink, I drink. I could easily not drink but I’m not sure how social situations get handled.

EVERY social event I’m involved with involves alcohol. And people look to me as the drink guy. I’m always making various drinks for people. People come to my house for drinks. I’d have no issue not drinking but I think others would be weird about me not drinking with them. That’s what I can’t wrap my mind around. How does one stop drinking yet maintain the same social life? Or do you sever those ties?
Club soda and lime.