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NYC is looking for a Rodent Control Czar... general aura of badassery and college degree required.

The Tradition

HR King
Apr 23, 2002
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New York City is looking to hire a top-notch exterminator with a passion for the Big Apple’s rat race.

The Adams administration posted a new job listing Wednesday for a Director of Rodent Migration, a position that pays between $120,000 and $170,000 — but also requires a college degree.

Officials were also hoping the ideal candidate possessed a “general aura of badassery,” according to the tongue in cheek job listing, that also called for a bachelor’s degree.

Applicants for the “dream job” should have a “virulent vehemence for vermin” and the “drive, determination and killer instinct needed to fight the real enemy – New York City’s relentless rat population,” the posting said.

“Cunning, voracious, and prolific, New York City’s rats are legendary for their survival skills, but they don’t run this city – we do,” it continued.

The city was looking to hire the new top rodent remover amid a push to clean up the city and address rising rat complaints, which had increased by 70% in the first eight months of 2022 compared to two years ago.

Homeowners who put trash on the curb before 8 p.m. will soon be fined under a new law. The current threshold to put garbage out is 4 p.m.

“I’ve made it clear I hate rats — and we’re gonna kill some rats,” Mayor Eric Adams said at last month’s bill-signing. “We’re putting a dent in our rodent problem.”

The new position came a week after City Hall directed agencies to cut some 4,700 vacant positions amid a budget shortfall.

A 2014 study by city officials found that rats outnumber New Yorkers by about two to one, meaning there would be approximately 18 million of the rodents burrowing around the boroughs today, if that ratio had remained intact.

 
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Have you ever watched the video of dog patrols out hunting rats? It's awesome. They surround a dumpster, give it a jiggle, the rats come falling out and the dogs tear them to shreds. Hopefully NYC's rat czar keeps the dogs on the payroll just for the videos.
 
That's not a lot of money for NYC. You'd have to commute in from an hour away. Pass.
 
That's not a lot of money for NYC. You'd have to commute in from an hour away. Pass.
I already know how I’d do this. I’d have 100 highly trained corgis and a nice glowing staff and a necklace that says rodent czar that lights up and spins. There’s got to be a budget that’s beyond my salary so these are all work uniform expenses. Me and my army of corgis would go burrough to burrough sweeping out the rats and mice. We’d hold training seminars for anyone that wants their dog to be a volunteer rodent fighter. After deputizing thousands of dogs throughout the city while we fight the scourge, we would use social media to direct swarms of deputy dogs to sweep the streets. These rats and mice will be heading west or back to Russia before they can sing ‘there are no cats in America’.
 
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