ADVERTISEMENT

Teachers told to remove rainbows, photos of same-sex spouses as DeSantis’ ‘Don’t Say Gay’ law goes into effect

I recently attended a retirement party for one of my former coworkers (teachers). While catching up on everything happening at school, I was told a story about one of the fifth grade teachers. A seventh grade student wrote an essay about a person they admired for an assignment in English. This seventh grader was a foster child. She wrote about the fifth grade teacher and how much she appreciated all the ways the teacher had helped her when she was her student. She finished her essay by saying she wished the teacher was her mom. The English teacher shared the essay with the fifth grade teacher.

The fifth grade teacher and her husband despite already having 3 children including one with special needs decided to go through the process of adopting the girl. That student is now out of foster care and a part of a family that loves and cares for her.

The relationships teachers build with students are very important and should be encouraged not viewed as some kind of attempt to corrupt children.
 
Why do you believe an elementary student needs to know if their teacher is gay?
Why do you believe that it is not OK for an elementary student to know if a teacher is gay or lesbian?

Before you respond (if you were so inclined), the question is rhetorical. I already know the answer.

You don’t have a problem with straight teachers having pictures on their desk of their significant other or spouse because that is an acceptable relationship to you. You have a problem with gay or lesbian teachers having pictures in their desk of their significant other or spouse because that is not an acceptable relationship to you.

Your objection to gay/lesbian relationships is founded in whatever religion is telling you that such relationships are sinful. If your sensitivities cannot handle the reality that gay and lesbian relationships exist and that … brace yourself … some gays and lesbians may actually be elementary school teachers, either home school your kids or pony up the cash to have them go to a religious school of your choice.

Either way, a significant number of us would prefer for people like you to keep your religion-based prejudices to yourself.
 
This is patently false. There are hundreds of teachers and coaches who have saved kids. Here’s one example. About 15 years ago, a 7th grader of mine watched his mom murdered in front of him. My coworker, a couple of weeks later, took him to an Iowa Basketball game, and bought him a new pair of basketball shoes.

Another, my first year teaching…a 6th grade boy of mine had a disgusting case of athletes foot. To this day it is the worst smell I have ever smelled. I bought him a new pair of athletic shoes, 5 pairs of socks, and Desinex out of my own pocket. He would go to the nurse each morning and get a change of socks and spray his feet. Teachers do this stuff, that parents should be handling, for our students, everyday all over this country. Yet we get shit on by ignorant people all the damn time about our jobs.
Cool, I'm glad you do things like this. Well done.

But in my original inquiry to you I noted that teachers ideally should be able to "spot problems." This happened in my youth too, despite a lack of relationship building.
 
  • Like
Reactions: goldmom
Cool, I'm glad you do things like this. Well done.

But in my original inquiry to you I noted that teachers ideally should be able to "spot problems." This happened in my youth too, despite a lack of relationship building.
Sometimes we can. But just like parents don’t always know what’s going on with their own children, WHO LIVE IN THEIR HOUSE, we don’t always know what’s going on with our students.

I mean, I knew J———— was unhappy. I didn’t know it was because he watched his mom attempt suicide twice. On the other hand, I knew M———- was a sweet kid but didn’t know stepdad was raping her.

I know I can be a defensive dick on here about teaching but I get tired of people who are ignorant about my job attacking what we do. Some of you are phenomenal at the jobs you do. Some of us teachers are phenomenal at working with kids…even though we post on HROT during the day. 😉

Another thing about relationships with kids….a lot of us go watch students at their various activities. Games. Plays. Etc. You know why? Because these kids WANT us there to watch them. I have seen them, time after time, excited that their teacher came to watch them. Do you know who else it means something to? Their parents. Parents want to know that we care about their kids. Like I said, I have a lot of MAGA parents who like me because of how I treat their children.
 
The ongoing discussion of the world relationships is mind boggling. Don't conservatives understand that relationship is not word with one simple definition across all human interactions?

I have hundreds of business relationships that are very different than my social relationships which are very different from my family relationships, etc.

Business relationships cross quite a broad span. Some are simply a name at the end of an email and some are close tight knit friendships but at the end of the day they are all business relationships. Guess which type are the most impactful, those that we know a lot about the other person. This includes knowing if they have a spouse (which infers sexuality), children, hobbies, education background, etc.

Teaching relationships are the same way. The most successful teaching relationship is when it gets deeper than "sit in the desk and listen to me for the next 50 minutes". This includes learning about each other, their background, hobbies, etc. People like to do business with people they like, teaching is no different. Showing an interest in what is going on with a student outside of the classroom is not grooming, it is building a better opportunity at success. Could this stray into areas of "John has two moms" or "Mr. Smith has a husband"? Absolutely and to be honest in those situations helps build a strong relationship, something we should want everyone to have in every aspect of their lives.
 
Sometimes we can. But just like parents don’t always know what’s going on with their own children, WHO LIVE IN THEIR HOUSE, we don’t always know what’s going on with our students.

I mean, I knew J———— was unhappy. I didn’t know it was because he watched his mom attempt suicide twice. On the other hand, I knew M———- was a sweet kid but didn’t know stepdad was raping her.

I know I can be a defensive dick on here about teaching but I get tired of people who are ignorant about my job attacking what we do. Some of you are phenomenal at the jobs you do. Some of us teachers are phenomenal at working with kids…even though we post on HROT during the day. 😉

Another thing about relationships with kids….a lot of us go watch students at their various activities. Games. Plays. Etc. You know why? Because these kids WANT us there to watch them. I have seen them, time after time, excited that their teacher came to watch them. Do you know who else it means something to? Their parents. Parents want to know that we care about their kids. Like I said, I have a lot of MAGA parents who like me because of how I treat their children.

TP I think I’m not alone (hope I’m not) in appreciating the vast majority of teachers who go waaay beyond teaching how to read / write / add. I spent lots of time in schools and also taught. And you are spot on. Above and beyond the job description.
I used to sub a LOT at a particular elementary school and the teachers all chipped in to have a side table set up in the cafeteria with PB&J and loaves of bread so kids who had no lunch money and their parents were so incompetent they never signed them up for free lunch.
Or they made themselves a sandwich during after school care...because there was no food at home.
The little ones in K-3 would sit in teachers lap for story time because no one ever cuddled or hugged them at home.
I saw a first grade girl who had to be taught to sit on a toilet. That for sure wasn’t in a curriculum manual.

Long story short what upsets me is there are too many parents who drop their child off and expect the school to be the parent and that is a huge societal failure.
And that extends to letting the school decide if the K3 kids need to know about sexual things. Let them be little kids. Play with their crayons.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Tom Paris
TP I think I’m not alone (hope I’m not) in appreciating the vast majority of teachers who go waaay beyond teaching how to read / write / add. I spent lots of time in schools and also taught. And you are spot on. Above and beyond the job description.
I used to sub a LOT at a particular elementary school and the teachers all chipped in to have a side table set up in the cafeteria with PB&J and loaves of bread so kids who had no lunch money and their parents were so incompetent they never signed them up for free lunch.
Or they made themselves a sandwich during after school care...because there was no food at home.
The little ones in K-3 would sit in teachers lap for story time because no one ever cuddled or hugged them at home.
I saw a first grade girl who had to be taught to sit on a toilet. That for sure wasn’t in a curriculum manual.

Long story short what upsets me is there are too many parents who drop their child off and expect the school to be the parent and that is a huge societal failure.
And that extends to letting the school decide if the K3 kids need to know about sexual things. Let them be little kids. Play with their crayons.
Sadly, districts take away your last 2 sentences. No time for that. Have to get those test scores. It’s so ridiculous. I have changed how I teach over the last decade - no written tests anymore in my room - because the kids have enough pressure on them all day long. I want them to be able to workout, have fun, and take a damn breath from all the expectations placed on them.
 
You want to keep secrets from parents or exclude them from decisions regarding their children then yoh as a teacher need to back the eff up. If you have evidence of abuse then you are mandatory reporters and should take that avenue. You think it is your role to provide some sort of under the table counseling to kids because their might be gay and the truth is it not your place. At all. You are not their parent and if at any point you think you should not keep the parents involve regarding their kids you better be picking up the phone in your role as a mandatory reporter. Otherwise inform the parents
 
Why is it even relevant?

The answer is in this thread. It’s “relevant” because people in positions of authority are making it relevant.

There should be zero issue … ZERO … with any teacher having a framed photo of that person’s spouse / significant other on their work desk. It’s entirely normal. Straight, gay or lesbian.

It’s a minority of quite vocal religious objectors that find it distasteful (or worse) for someone who isn’t in a straight relationship to have the audacity to have a picture of someone they love on their desk.

And, until this vocal religious minority learns to get over their sensitivities that not everyone must be like them and share their same religious beliefs, it will very much be “relevant.”
 
There's no "don't Say Gay Law"

Anyone taking pictures of their spouse off their desk, or rainbow stickers off the wall, doesn't understand the mischaracterized law.

It about curriculum. If teachers would all stick to that concept, there wouldn't even be a discussion, much less the need for a law.

It's sad that people here continue to perpetuate lies.
It actually has very little to do with curriculum. There's not indoctrination in the curriculum. It's about removing a child's right to privacy and forcing counselors to out students to their parents if they speak of it to a teacher or counselor. This is a terrible solution which will lead to more suicide amongst gay children.
 
ADVERTISEMENT