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What Do Female Incels Really Want?

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I thought it was a good read.

Been following a couple of writers that spend a lot of time in this sort of "online culture" space, and becoming more convinced that it matters more than most of us think it does or should. This stuff is spilling out into the "real world." Most dramatically in things like mass shootings. But also things like cancel culture, teen girl gender transitioning, radical politics, etc that are now part of the real world are rooted and influenced in these online cultures.

It's a weird world now, where more and more people's online lives are more real, and provide a more clear reward system, than their real lives. Anyone can find a community for whatever odd feelings or circumstances or kinks that they are experiencing, and that thing becomes identity. And those communities have their own rules, mores, traditions, aesthetics, etc that have nothing to do with normal culture and society as has been developed over the last 1000 years.

And there is no way for a culture or real world community to respond.

We are really headed for some very, very strange times.
 
I thought it was a good read.

Been following a couple of writers that spend a lot of time in this sort of "online culture" space, and becoming more convinced that it matters more than most of us think it does or should. This stuff is spilling out into the "real world." Most dramatically in things like mass shootings. But also things like cancel culture, teen girl gender transitioning, radical politics, etc that are now part of the real world are rooted and influenced in these online cultures.

It's a weird world now, where more and more people's online lives are more real, and provide a more clear reward system, than their real lives. Anyone can find a community for whatever odd feelings or circumstances or kinks that they are experiencing, and that thing becomes identity. And those communities have their own rules, mores, traditions, aesthetics, etc that have nothing to do with normal culture and society as has been developed over the last 1000 years.

And there is no way for a culture or real world community to respond.

We are really headed for some very, very strange times.
Right, definitely. Not as bound by (nearly as much) of a shared experience anymore. Which is good and bad.

In a way, we're realizing the (classic) liberal individualist's dream: everybody gets to be how they want to be, and get to organize as they see fit. Less pressure to conform to any large scale societal standards. This is probably much better for people that would be outcasts or pushed aside to the fringe traditionally.

But as a result of this new infrastructure we're barely able to communicate with each other because we lead such different social existences. What was a net positive for the outcasts also caused a bunch of other things to go out whack. Oops.

(and of course then the communication level algorithms that encourage dysfunctional discourse online, to boot)
 
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Right, definitely. Not as bound by (nearly as much) of a shared experience anymore. Which is good and bad.

In a way, we're realizing the (classic) liberal individualist's dream: everybody gets to be how they want to be, and get to organize as they see fit. Less pressure to conform to any large scale societal standards. This is probably much better for people that would be outcasts or pushed aside to the fringe traditionally.

But as a result of this new infrastructure we're barely able to communicate with each other because we lead such different social existences. What was a net positive for the outcasts also caused a bunch of other things to go out whack. Oops.

(and of course then the communication level algorithms that encourage dysfunctional discourse online, to boot)

Yep. Once you accept that for a large and growing number of people, their online life is their "real life", it gives a much bigger perspective. You have all these people now that are able to live in very insular structured communities where they get to make the rules, they get to gatekeep, they get to control information, language, customs, morals, ethic, etc of their communities. And those things need not in any way resemble what a thousand years of civilized society has developed. And, more importantly, they're largely out of the reach of any response, legal or otherwise.

In the vast majority of these cases, the community is largely harmless. But a surprising amount is probably not. They might not result in a school shooting, but they can have very bad effects on mental health, healthy relationships, etc.

I mean, up until our modern era, if you found out there was some kind of club in your town where people liked to dress up like mascots and have sex, and it freaked people out, the community would take action. They might outlaw furry costumes, they might make it illegal to wear a mask, they could have their name outed in the paper, and there's a good chance the sheriff would burn down their orgy barn.

The initial reaction to that is "Well, great. They aren't hurting anyone. They deserve to have their weird community without harassment." And you'd be correct.

But now do the same thing for pedophiles, pro-anorexia, cutting and self abuse enthusiasts, racists, anarchists, etc. They're equally out of reach of any response in a practical sense. And that absolutely has real world ramifications that we don't have any tools to deal with.
 
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