Conservative Iowa lawmakers are pursuing legislation that would create the “School of Intellectual Freedom” based at the University of Iowa.
What is intellectual freedom? Legislators will let us know
Republicans see this as a chance to build a conservative foothold at a university chock full of libs. It will teach the values of free speech and civil discourse. Conservatives will have free speech and everyone else must be civil.
I fear the new college is for intellectual freedom in the same way the German Democratic Republic was for democracy.
Sure, I may be too cynical, but have you seen what conservative politicians are doing to “reform” higher education around the country? It’s being dismantled in the service of ideology. It’s not pretty.
We don’t know exactly what classes the new school will teach. I have some ideas.
Course: America’s Heritage (abridged)
Instructor: Patriot-Bot — The Cyber Patriot
Description: Our specially programed cyber bot will take you on a pleasant journey through American history, emphasizing the people, documents and moments that shaped us into the perfect, exceptional nation we are. You won’t hear about slavery, Jim Crow, lynchings, the theft of Indigenous lands, Vietnam or persistent racism. Patriot-Bot dispenses with those unpleasantries. And before you challenge Patriot-Bot, remember he is set on stun.
Course: Do your own research
Instructor: U.S. Rep, Marjorie Taylor Greene (Online)
Description: The lamestream media routinely shoots down the true explanations of news events — the stolen 2020 election to Jewish space lasers and how DEI causes plane crashes. Lamestreamers smugly use phrases such as “no evidence” and “totally untrue.” This course will show you how to ignore the lying media by doing your own research. The truth is out there.
Course: God and the Constitution
Instructor: Bob Vander Plaats
Description: As any red-blooded patriotic American knows, God was the real author of the U.S. Constitution. He handed it down to the nation’s founders, fully completed, which was a time-saver. God did not mention many individual rights championed today by our secular overlords. LGBTQ? God didn’t address it, and we know he would want us to bulldoze their civil rights and toss them into a pit of despair. Don’t like it? Talk to the author.
Course: Colorblind Society
Instructor: Some middle-aged white guy yet to be named
Description: Are you, a white person, tired of being told by leftists that discrimination and racism remain alive today in the U.S.? It makes us feel guilty and sad, which in some ways is worse than slavery. This course will show how racism ended with the 1982 release of the hit song “Ebony and Ivory” by Stevie Wonder and Paul McCartney. By the end of the course, you won’t see any color at all, and how we’re living in perfect harmony.
Course: Abortion rights — a Man’s Perspective
Instructor: The same middle-aged white guy teaching colorblind
Description: We’ve seen hysterical women agitating for their abortion rights after the U.S. Supreme Court overturned Roe v. Wade. But the big question is what do men think? Just because women have to take on the risks of carrying a child to term, go through painful labor and then take on most of the child care duties doesn’t mean men don’t have feelings, too. This course will seek to mansplain what’s really happening.
Course: The right to be wrong
Instructor: Your cousin from social media
Time and time again, conservatives feel stifled by the heavy hand of socialism whenever they try to speak out on social media platforms. But as we’ve learned during the Trump years, alternative facts are just as important as boring, normal facts. Your posts don’t have to be true. They simply need to feel true.
Course: Immigration seminar
Instructor: Stephen Miller (online)
Description: Thanks to President Donald Trump, we now know most asylum-seekers and undocumented migrants are murderers, rapists and worse. Trump’s immigration whisperer Stephen Miller will explain how the “nation of immigrants” cliche is false and how immigrants here illegally, and maybe legally, are at the root of all American problems. You’ll learn how these animals are poisoning our blood. On the last day of class, students will participate in an ICE raid.
Liberals — America’s most dangerous threat
Instructor: Republican Party of Iowa Chairman Jeff Kaufmann
Russia, China, climate change and threats to democracy? All pale in comparison to the socialist communist agenda of liberals, who want to destroy America as we know it. They champion expensive free stuff for the lazy poor, insist the “separation of church and state” is a real thing and believe draining wetlands and allowing pollutants to flow freely into our water are bad things. And they keep squawking about climate change. These emasculating woke issues have no place in a muscular, Alpha male nation. Grunt.
(319) 398-8262; todd.dorman@thegazette.com
www.thegazette.com
What is intellectual freedom? Legislators will let us know
Republicans see this as a chance to build a conservative foothold at a university chock full of libs. It will teach the values of free speech and civil discourse. Conservatives will have free speech and everyone else must be civil.
I fear the new college is for intellectual freedom in the same way the German Democratic Republic was for democracy.
Sure, I may be too cynical, but have you seen what conservative politicians are doing to “reform” higher education around the country? It’s being dismantled in the service of ideology. It’s not pretty.
We don’t know exactly what classes the new school will teach. I have some ideas.
Course: America’s Heritage (abridged)
Instructor: Patriot-Bot — The Cyber Patriot
Description: Our specially programed cyber bot will take you on a pleasant journey through American history, emphasizing the people, documents and moments that shaped us into the perfect, exceptional nation we are. You won’t hear about slavery, Jim Crow, lynchings, the theft of Indigenous lands, Vietnam or persistent racism. Patriot-Bot dispenses with those unpleasantries. And before you challenge Patriot-Bot, remember he is set on stun.
Course: Do your own research
Instructor: U.S. Rep, Marjorie Taylor Greene (Online)
Description: The lamestream media routinely shoots down the true explanations of news events — the stolen 2020 election to Jewish space lasers and how DEI causes plane crashes. Lamestreamers smugly use phrases such as “no evidence” and “totally untrue.” This course will show you how to ignore the lying media by doing your own research. The truth is out there.
Course: God and the Constitution
Instructor: Bob Vander Plaats
Description: As any red-blooded patriotic American knows, God was the real author of the U.S. Constitution. He handed it down to the nation’s founders, fully completed, which was a time-saver. God did not mention many individual rights championed today by our secular overlords. LGBTQ? God didn’t address it, and we know he would want us to bulldoze their civil rights and toss them into a pit of despair. Don’t like it? Talk to the author.
Course: Colorblind Society
Instructor: Some middle-aged white guy yet to be named
Description: Are you, a white person, tired of being told by leftists that discrimination and racism remain alive today in the U.S.? It makes us feel guilty and sad, which in some ways is worse than slavery. This course will show how racism ended with the 1982 release of the hit song “Ebony and Ivory” by Stevie Wonder and Paul McCartney. By the end of the course, you won’t see any color at all, and how we’re living in perfect harmony.
Course: Abortion rights — a Man’s Perspective
Instructor: The same middle-aged white guy teaching colorblind
Description: We’ve seen hysterical women agitating for their abortion rights after the U.S. Supreme Court overturned Roe v. Wade. But the big question is what do men think? Just because women have to take on the risks of carrying a child to term, go through painful labor and then take on most of the child care duties doesn’t mean men don’t have feelings, too. This course will seek to mansplain what’s really happening.
Course: The right to be wrong
Instructor: Your cousin from social media
Time and time again, conservatives feel stifled by the heavy hand of socialism whenever they try to speak out on social media platforms. But as we’ve learned during the Trump years, alternative facts are just as important as boring, normal facts. Your posts don’t have to be true. They simply need to feel true.
Course: Immigration seminar
Instructor: Stephen Miller (online)
Description: Thanks to President Donald Trump, we now know most asylum-seekers and undocumented migrants are murderers, rapists and worse. Trump’s immigration whisperer Stephen Miller will explain how the “nation of immigrants” cliche is false and how immigrants here illegally, and maybe legally, are at the root of all American problems. You’ll learn how these animals are poisoning our blood. On the last day of class, students will participate in an ICE raid.
Liberals — America’s most dangerous threat
Instructor: Republican Party of Iowa Chairman Jeff Kaufmann
Russia, China, climate change and threats to democracy? All pale in comparison to the socialist communist agenda of liberals, who want to destroy America as we know it. They champion expensive free stuff for the lazy poor, insist the “separation of church and state” is a real thing and believe draining wetlands and allowing pollutants to flow freely into our water are bad things. And they keep squawking about climate change. These emasculating woke issues have no place in a muscular, Alpha male nation. Grunt.
(319) 398-8262; todd.dorman@thegazette.com
Opinion: What will Iowa’s School of Intellectual Freedom teach?
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