Wiping Problems

[CJ Beat Hard]

Well something seems to have changed and I don’t know what. I don’t know if I’ve secretly changed the way I wipe, if my poops have changed consistency, if my butthole hairs have grown longer acquiring more dingleberries or what. But it seems like I have to wipe more than before. No more two wipe and get out of there. Maybe I need to change to a stand up wiper. I don’t know but it’s a shitty situation I’ve got going on.

Any help would be appreciated.

 

[Bonerfarts]

 

[Dorrman]

Get a bidet, It's life changing

 

[IAFB2021Champs]

Well something seems to have changed and I don’t know what. I don’t know if I’ve secretly changed the way I wipe, if my poops have changed consistency, if my butthole hairs have grown longer acquiring more dingleberries or what. But it seems like I have to wipe more than before. No more two wipe and get out of there. Maybe I need to change to a stand up wiper. I don’t know but it’s a shitty situation I’ve got going on.

Any help would be appreciated.

I think you should probably start wiping back to front. That should solve all your problems.

 

[NDallasRuss]

That's what I was coming here to add. Thank you!

 

[millah_22]

Well something seems to have changed and I don’t know what. I don’t know if I’ve secretly changed the way I wipe, if my poops have changed consistency, if my butthole hairs have grown longer acquiring more dingleberries or what. But it seems like I have to wipe more than before. No more two wipe and get out of there. Maybe I need to change to a stand up wiper. I don’t know but it’s a shitty situation I’ve got going on.

Any help would be appreciated.

stop sleeping naked or you'll get skiddies on your sheets

 

[QChawks]

 

[ping72]

You’re not drinking enough water. It makes your poop stickier and more likely to cling to your anus.

 

[ThorneStockton]

Get a bidet. I'll use it for non-poop breaks as well.

 

[ping72]

Get a bidet, It's life changing

This. I’ve had one for a few years now… I feel disgustingly dirty now when I don’t use one.

Seriously, it’s 2024… some of ya’ll living in the Stone Age still.

 

[torbee]

Get a bidet. I'll use it for non-poop breaks as well.

We installed a combo bidet/drinking fountain in our restroom.

Gamechanger.

 

[EasyHawk]

Do not wipe too vigorously nor too much. You do not want the anal fissures.

 

[fredjr82]

This. I’ve had one for a few years now… I feel disgustingly dirty now when I don’t use one.

Seriously, it’s 2024… some of ya’ll living in the Stone Age still.

I went to PClub with a salesperson I supported. We had a golfing excursion with our SOs and at the turn he came out of the club house a little damp. I asked what happened and he said he showered after a gnarly dump. He was used to a bidet and feels gross just using TP. It was a gorgeous course otherwise and the Vodka Transfusions were on point and not on my tab!

 

[jasonrann]

I am very sorry to hear about your anal cancer. Farrah Fawcett had it too. Thank you for sharing this.

 

[tumorboy]

 

[alaskanseminole]

Well something seems to have changed and I don’t know what. I don’t know if I’ve secretly changed the way I wipe, if my poops have changed consistency, if my butthole hairs have grown longer acquiring more dingleberries or what. But it seems like I have to wipe more than before. No more two wipe and get out of there. Maybe I need to change to a stand up wiper. I don’t know but it’s a shitty situation I’ve got going on.

Any help would be appreciated.

You can thank me later

/thread

 

[Funky Bunch]

Am I surprised people here are having problems wiping their ass? Not really.

 

[LuciousBDragon]

Well something seems to have changed and I don’t know what. I don’t know if I’ve secretly changed the way I wipe, if my poops have changed consistency, if my butthole hairs have grown longer acquiring more dingleberries or what. But it seems like I have to wipe more than before. No more two wipe and get out of there. Maybe I need to change to a stand up wiper. I don’t know but it’s a shitty situation I’ve got going on.

Any help would be appreciated.

Along with the other solid advice already mentioned, I would suggest refraining from regular anal sex. That only exacerbates by compacting the feces that is in there and when it mixes with semen can create the fecal consistency you are describing.

 

[HawkeyeHitman]

We installed a combo bidet/drinking fountain in our restroom.

Gamechanger.

Does that work better for you than having little flick lick your butthole?

 

[Sharky1203]

 

[BelemNole]

Along with the other solid advice already mentioned, I would suggest refraining from regular anal sex. That only exacerbates by compacting the feces that is in there and when it mixes with semen can create the fecal consistency you are describing.

Which type of anal sex is regular and which is irregular?
Asking for a friend.

 

[LuciousBDragon]

Which type of anal sex is regular and which is irregular?
Asking for a friend.

Regular as in frequency (not type). You know, 5-6 x day.

 

[Tenacious E]

Well something seems to have changed and I don’t know what. I don’t know if I’ve secretly changed the way I wipe, if my poops have changed consistency, if my butthole hairs have grown longer acquiring more dingleberries or what. But it seems like I have to wipe more than before. No more two wipe and get out of there. Maybe I need to change to a stand up wiper. I don’t know but it’s a shitty situation I’ve got going on.

Any help would be appreciated.

You need a bidet. Like $40. Don’t get the heated kind. It is like jumping in a plunge pool, except the plunge pool is jumping up the poop chute. Refreshing.

 

[Tom Paris]

You need a bidet. Like $40. Don’t get the heated kind. It is like jumping in a plunge pool, except the plunge pool is jumping up the poop chute. Refreshing.

I just placed the order. 🤣🤣🤣

 

[OutbackBowl2017]

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[SI_NYC]

Well something seems to have changed and I don’t know what. I don’t know if I’ve secretly changed the way I wipe, if my poops have changed consistency, if my butthole hairs have grown longer acquiring more dingleberries or what. But it seems like I have to wipe more than before. No more two wipe and get out of there. Maybe I need to change to a stand up wiper. I don’t know but it’s a shitty situation I’ve got going on.

Any help would be appreciated.

Do yourself a favor and get one of these. $60 and you will wonder why it took you so long.

 

[nu2u]

For centuries, before toilet paper became commonplace in the early 1900s, humans used a variety of objects and materials to wipe. Sticks, leaves, rope, stones, corncobs, paper, straw, even sea shells.

Toilet paper is adequate. I suggest that the bigger wiping problem in our overweight/obese society is the inability of the average fat ass to sufficiently reach their shit hole. 😁

 

[hawkmart]

You need a bidet. Like $40. Don’t get the heated kind. It is like jumping in a plunge pool, except the plunge pool is jumping up the poop chute. Refreshing.

I didn't get a fancy $40 one, the one I got off Amazon only cost $20 but yes they are most definitely refreshing.

 

[Tom Paris]

Luxe NIO 120 on Amazon. $40. Solid reviews.

 

[Fan In Black]

you could get a pool full of shrimp, parrotfishes, or guppies. after pooping get in the pool and spread your butt cheeks and they will eat all the poop away. It feels good too.

 

[Formerly Rockymtnole]

 

[Hawk-A-Doodle-Doo]

Ol' Doodle doesn't know the answer...but if there's one thing Doodle has learned in all his years on this forum, it's that this probably has something to do with OP's mom.

 

[Tenacious E]

Luxe NIO 120 on Amazon. $40. Solid reviews.

That’s what I have.

 

[Thunderlips71]

I’m having the same problems as OP. I’ll be 53 this summer and felt like I’ve spent the majority of my early 50’s wiping my ass. Read some articles recently and the key is “gut health = butt health”.

We bought a bidet from Costco for about one-fiddy and are happy with it - I think the brand name is Ove(?) The warm seat and warm water are a nice touch, but I should read the users manual because the air dryer is really hot and nearly burns my sensitive sphincter. CSB.

 

[CJ Beat Hard]

Those with a bidet, what do you do about splatter patties and keeping it clean? Do you have to clean that sucker after every shit?

 

[CJ Beat Hard]

Tried a different wiping technique today and it was just painful going the opposite direction.

 

[Honda Hawk]

Dude wipes...dude.