Flying overseas with a 2 year old…
- Thread starter BlIIlken2
- Start date
Couple old fashions put them down for the count at that age. No worries…
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Yes, get the kiddo drunk. But be sure to pay for extra seat i.e. fat shamming thread
That’s dumb. Once they’re tanked they go into the overhead compartment.
No, I mean why fly with a screaming snot machine unless you absolutely have to do so?
not worth it. They’re not going to remember anything important and just be an extra expense and hassle
I hope you’re kid is not on my flight after popping down $$$.
I flew with three kids in coach class overseas back in the day. And they lived in the countries we flew to. They all turned out ok. Tranquillo!
Look at it this way. Your reward for putting up with a two year old an entire flight is putting up with a two year old an entire trip.
No, that was a different guy... don't remember the handle and has been gone for a long time.
Maybe he crashed?
He was baseballer, then something like nks or something, I dont know after that.
Why are you thinking of doing this?
Good luck with your decision.
Good luck with your decision.
I’m sure fellow passengers in first or business class will love having you and your two year old by them.
Why would they have to know?
1. Get 2 yr old tanked in an airport lounge/restaurant
2. When you board, place the drunk bastard over your shoulder as you board with…parents with small children
3. Once in your seat put your dead weight child in their seat while you put the carry on in the overhead compartment. Make sure there’s enough room for your drunk child.
4. Place a binky and pacifier and maybe some water in the space you left available for drunk child.
5. Since you don’t want anybody seeing you stuff drunk child in the overhead compartment…say in that “l’m whispering way too loud voice”……”oh crap, look at that fat bastard coming down the aisle, hope he doesn’t sit by me”
This locks all eyes forward for around 5 seconds.
Plenty of time to stuff drunk 2 yr old in the compartment. All you have to do from then on is to threaten to kick anybody’s ass that wants to open that compartment.
Simple.
A 2 year old won’t enjoy it and you won’t enjoy having a 2 year old. Hoping you have a grandparent that will take the kid while you travel.
Our kids flew a lot with distant family to visit, but we were mostly shorter flights and always made sure to have food/snacks, which help immensely. First time we went overseas was to London when my youngest was 5, so by that point, he was long past the crying baby stage and instead was fully in on watching Pixar movies on the plane.
My best advice would be to have plenty of snacks at the ready, any entertainment devices that work for them and, whenever your flight is, do your best to keep them on their home sleep schedule until you get to your destination. You know your kid better than I do and know whether they tend to be screamers when disrupted. Looking back, I think my oldest could have been fine, he was always pretty easy, but my last two would have been nightmares with flights that long at 2yo. They were fine for a couple hours to see grandparents, mostly, but 6+ would have been a nightmare for everyone.
My best advice would be to have plenty of snacks at the ready, any entertainment devices that work for them and, whenever your flight is, do your best to keep them on their home sleep schedule until you get to your destination. You know your kid better than I do and know whether they tend to be screamers when disrupted. Looking back, I think my oldest could have been fine, he was always pretty easy, but my last two would have been nightmares with flights that long at 2yo. They were fine for a couple hours to see grandparents, mostly, but 6+ would have been a nightmare for everyone.
He's not? I actually used a gif of a drunken pilot in what was an obviously hammered post a couple days ago. I guess I'm not sure why but I thought this was the latest incarnation. Oh well, it was still a good find, it'll get some use in our golf group text for my drunken pilot buddy.
And take it with a glass of Vodka. Trust me, I'm pre-med.
We took two kids under three to the Caymans last year. You are right in that they will not remember, but we have the memories of our kids on the beach. Grandparents on arrival only made the experience worthwhile.
hawkeyetraveler
HR Heisman
This is the correct answer. I fly international biz class frequently and it always pisses me off when a family with kids that young brings them into business class. People pay the money for for the ability to sleep and work quietly. Knowing that makes it pretty inconsiderate.
Babies and toddlers belong in coach…full stop.
1. Suckers for takeoff and landing (or drinks, keep them swallowing for ears)
2. Hate to say it, but iPad...take it, and forgive yourself. Get plenty of kid games that don't require wifi.
3. Use the movies in the back of the seat.
4. Get up every 90 min-2 hours to go to the bathroom/walk the aisles.
It'll be fine. Overseas with a 2 y/o sounds like more work than it's worth. The plane ride is the easy part.
2. Hate to say it, but iPad...take it, and forgive yourself. Get plenty of kid games that don't require wifi.
3. Use the movies in the back of the seat.
4. Get up every 90 min-2 hours to go to the bathroom/walk the aisles.
It'll be fine. Overseas with a 2 y/o sounds like more work than it's worth. The plane ride is the easy part.
We'll assume it's an 8 hour flight to your destination. Think about being at home with a 2 year old. Can they hold their attention for a decent amount of time at home, when there are unlimited things to keep them entertained? Now put that in a metal tube with limited options and space.
Save up and take them when they're 16. You'll both have a better experience. Though they may "teenage hate" you by then.
I say tough shit. If the airline doesn’t have a written policy stating toddlers and babies aren’t allowed in business class, then nobody is paying for that convenience. If your work is so important have your company book you a private flight, or just pay a couple hundred bucks for some noise cancelling headphones which will mitigate the noise.
hawkeyetraveler
HR Heisman
I’m not saying you don’t have the right to be an inconsiderate prick. This is America in 2023 - knock your inconsiderate self out. Just remember when your kid is screaming in the middle of the night: everyone around you thinks you are a prick…because you are.
And for what it is worth, when my kids were that age we flew coach for this very reason.
Because it is faster going transatlantic than a steam ship?
I actually sat by a screaming toddler the last time I flew first class. As I dosed off while wearing my noise cancelling headphones, I glanced over at a guy who was visibly annoyed, wearing no headphones and apparently expecting peace and quiet on a public flight and thought to myself, “what a dumbass”.
Never thought I’d come across the same dipshit on HORT.
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Even after getting through the flight, the jet lag and time change are going to make your toddler miserable to be around. After dealing with it flying a few hours in the US with a 2-year old and infant, we decided that the kids at that age are just as happy going to Omaha, Minneapolis, or some other drivable city (from Iowa) than they are somewhere more glamorous and it’s a lot easier on us. We saved the Europe trips for just us parents and can do them with the kids when they are older.
hawkeyetraveler
HR Heisman
For the record I have no issue on domestic flights. International 7-14 hour flights are a different beast and some of us have to walk off the plane and go straight to meetings on a regular basis. It’s why businesses are willing to pay 7K+ for the business class ticket in the first place. It makes a huge difference in productivity and business impact. Especially if you do it frequently.
But go ahead and justify bringing a toddler at $7K+ (or equivalent in points) for their ticket while calling me a dipshit. I, and virtually everyone else in the cabin, will continue to believe it is inconsiderate.
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