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Stumbled across this in a follow up story to the “Trailer Park Boys Yacht Party” pic. I think @naturalmwa will find this one of interest!
Jerry And His Amazing Technicolor Dreamcock: The Jerry Falwell Jr. Story! Allegedly!
Evan Hurst
September. 09, 2019 04:58
When we clicked on the Politico long-readeverybody's talking about today, about Jerry Falwell Jr., leader of the Liberty University clown college, and his destruction of what passes as his father's legacy, the first thing we noticed was the author of the piece. Brandon Ambrosino ... haven't we told that guy to go **** himself before? Yes, we have, five years ago! Ambrosino was one of a contrarian cohort of gay conservative journalists who wrote from time to time to tell us all that the mainstream LGBT movement was very unfair to those poor conservative Christians, who just wanted the freedom to deny LGBT folks life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness at the ballot box, in the courts, and anywhere else they could. Frankly, he pissed us off, but then we forgot about him.
However, as it happens, we think Ambrosino is probably exactly the right journalist to tell the inside story of what's really going on at Liberty. He went to school there, he knows the characters involved, and he even, at least several years back, had a "soft spot for the deceased evil known as Jerry Falwell," as we wrote at the time. He knows Jerry Jr. He knows Jonathan Falwell, Jerry's brother, who runs Jerry Sr.'s old Thomas Road Baptist Church.
Part of the title of Ambrosino's piece is "Someone's Gotta Tell The Freakin' Truth," and that's a quote from a current Liberty official who's close to the Falwells and who dished to Ambrosino -- of course, off the record. Indeed, that person was one of "more than two dozen" current and former Liberty employees who spoke for the article -- of course, off the record.
There's no way we can do this piece justice, as it is 8,000 words long, so you need to read the whole thing, as they say on the internet. But we will hit the highlights, only some of which are about Jerry Falwell Jr.'s penis.
Quickly, though, let's review what we've learned about Falwell Jr. lately: There's the thing about Falwell's HOT SEXY personal trainer Ben Crosswhite, who SOMEHOW got himself a $2 million athletic club from Liberty University for the low, low price of No Dollars. Crosswhite is a different HOT SEXY guy from Giancarlo Granda, the poolboy who made friends with Jerry and Becki Falwell and somehow came out of the deal running a multi-million dollar hotel. (By the way, Becki comes off in Ambrosino's piece like A ASSHOLE.) Oh yeah, and what were all those nakey dirty pictures that somebody had that involved some untold number of Falwells, which incarcerated former Trump lawyer Michael Cohen had to help with, allegedly? Don't know, don't wanna see them! (Unless they are of the personal trainer, in which case look up our email and we'll be in our bunk!)
Anyway, that's some background, here's Jerry's penis:
At Liberty, Falwell is "very, very vocal" about his "sex life," in the words of one Liberty official—a characterization multiple current and former university officials and employees interviewed for this story support. In a car ride about a decade ago with a senior university official who has since left Liberty, "all he wanted to talk about was how he would nail his wife, how she couldn't handle [his penis size], and stuff of that sort," this former official recalled. Falwell did not respond to questions about this incident.
That is ... definitely ... yeah ... um ... just totally normal! As anyone who grew up in evangelical cult subculture can tell you, married heterosexual guys are definitely encouraged to talk all the time about how their hot hard cocks can't even fit in their wife! Don't believe them? Maybe they will show you, NO HOMO! And don't you say nothin' about "sounds like little Jerry's trying too hard," because the only thing that's trying TOO HARD around here is JERRY'S SUPER-HARD COCK, trying to get INSIDE HIS WIFE!
More than simply talking with employees about his wife in a sexual manner, on at least one occasion, Falwell shared a photo of his wife wearing what appeared to be a French maid costume, according to a longtime Liberty employee with firsthand knowledge of the image and the fallout that followed.
Still very normal, especially for the president of a very serious Bible college. "Here is my wife in a French maid costume. Should I tell you the part about MY COCK again?"
Falwell intended to send the image to his and Becki's personal trainer, Ben Crosswhite, as a "thank you" for helping his wife achieve her fitness goals, the employee said.
OK, maybe this is a little bit weird. We have only had a personal trainer for about six minutes, but we don't think it's customary for married hetero men to send trainers slutty pictures of their wives in order to "thank them" for being such good heterosexual personal trainers. Gym bros are free to correct us, but until they do, we're gonna say that's not a thing. You know, unless Jerry 'n' Ben have a rapport that involves exchanging sexxx pictures with each other. Hey, maybe they jerk off together, but not in the gay way! IT'S FINE, IT'S CALLED MALE BONDING, OK?
Hey pop quiz for anybody who knows Jerry 'n' Ben! Are their phones password-protected? Now you know why. ALLEGEDLY.
In the course of texting, Falwell accidentally sent the message to several other people, necessitating a cleanup.
What ... what kind of "cleanup"?
In a statement, Falwell denied this. "I never had any picture of Becki Falwell dressed in a French maid uniform, and never sent such a non-existent photo to Ben Crosswhite."
Well that is a very particular denial. Maybe she was dressed in something else! Maybe she was dressed in her birthday suit! Maybe it wasn't Becki Falwell! And also too, the Politico article says right there that he didn't send the pic to Ben Crosswhite, but that he meant to.
I'm into havin' sex, I ain't into makin' love, So come give me a hug if you into gettin' rubbed, You can find me in the club ... ALLEGEDLY!
Anyway, Jerry Falwell Jr. denies the existence of all pictures, even the pictures Politico included in its piece, like for instance of Jerry out at Da Club (like all Christian college presidents) with his son Trey. The WALL club, specifically, which is down the street from the hostel Trey co-owns with dad's poolboy, which Ambrosino has reported es muy gay-friendly:
In a statement on August 21, Jerry Falwell denied the existence of any photo of him at the club. "There was no picture snapped of me at WALL nightclub or any other nightclub," Falwell wrote. "I'm sure you already knew that though."
When told that I had obtained a photo of him for this article, Falwell said I was "terribly mistaken." "If you show me the picture, I can probably help you out," he wrote. "I think you are making some incorrect assumptions, or have been told false things or are seeing something that was photo--shopped."
After I sent him the photo, as well as a photo of Trey at Wall, Falwell responded: "I never asked anyone to get rid of any pictures on the internet of me and I never have seen the picture you claim is of me below. If the person in the picture is me, it was likely photo-shopped." In a second email sent 23 minutes later, Falwell wrote: "But the bigger question, Brandon, is why would I want a picture like that taken down if I had seen it?"
OK.
@POLITICOMag Jerry Falwell has gone on record denying the existence of any risqué photos *of himself*. (Read the pi… https://t.co/90kmGowaIF
— Brandon Ambrosino (@Brandon Ambrosino)1568024969.0
Hate it when people Photoshop Jerry Falwell Jr., the president of a college where you're not allowed to drink or dance or **** or trip the light fantastic -- into the club scene in Miami all the time. That's just rude.
Jerry And His Amazing Technicolor Dreamcock: The Jerry Falwell Jr. Story! Allegedly!
Evan Hurst
September. 09, 2019 04:58
When we clicked on the Politico long-readeverybody's talking about today, about Jerry Falwell Jr., leader of the Liberty University clown college, and his destruction of what passes as his father's legacy, the first thing we noticed was the author of the piece. Brandon Ambrosino ... haven't we told that guy to go **** himself before? Yes, we have, five years ago! Ambrosino was one of a contrarian cohort of gay conservative journalists who wrote from time to time to tell us all that the mainstream LGBT movement was very unfair to those poor conservative Christians, who just wanted the freedom to deny LGBT folks life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness at the ballot box, in the courts, and anywhere else they could. Frankly, he pissed us off, but then we forgot about him.
However, as it happens, we think Ambrosino is probably exactly the right journalist to tell the inside story of what's really going on at Liberty. He went to school there, he knows the characters involved, and he even, at least several years back, had a "soft spot for the deceased evil known as Jerry Falwell," as we wrote at the time. He knows Jerry Jr. He knows Jonathan Falwell, Jerry's brother, who runs Jerry Sr.'s old Thomas Road Baptist Church.
Part of the title of Ambrosino's piece is "Someone's Gotta Tell The Freakin' Truth," and that's a quote from a current Liberty official who's close to the Falwells and who dished to Ambrosino -- of course, off the record. Indeed, that person was one of "more than two dozen" current and former Liberty employees who spoke for the article -- of course, off the record.
There's no way we can do this piece justice, as it is 8,000 words long, so you need to read the whole thing, as they say on the internet. But we will hit the highlights, only some of which are about Jerry Falwell Jr.'s penis.
Quickly, though, let's review what we've learned about Falwell Jr. lately: There's the thing about Falwell's HOT SEXY personal trainer Ben Crosswhite, who SOMEHOW got himself a $2 million athletic club from Liberty University for the low, low price of No Dollars. Crosswhite is a different HOT SEXY guy from Giancarlo Granda, the poolboy who made friends with Jerry and Becki Falwell and somehow came out of the deal running a multi-million dollar hotel. (By the way, Becki comes off in Ambrosino's piece like A ASSHOLE.) Oh yeah, and what were all those nakey dirty pictures that somebody had that involved some untold number of Falwells, which incarcerated former Trump lawyer Michael Cohen had to help with, allegedly? Don't know, don't wanna see them! (Unless they are of the personal trainer, in which case look up our email and we'll be in our bunk!)
Anyway, that's some background, here's Jerry's penis:
At Liberty, Falwell is "very, very vocal" about his "sex life," in the words of one Liberty official—a characterization multiple current and former university officials and employees interviewed for this story support. In a car ride about a decade ago with a senior university official who has since left Liberty, "all he wanted to talk about was how he would nail his wife, how she couldn't handle [his penis size], and stuff of that sort," this former official recalled. Falwell did not respond to questions about this incident.
That is ... definitely ... yeah ... um ... just totally normal! As anyone who grew up in evangelical cult subculture can tell you, married heterosexual guys are definitely encouraged to talk all the time about how their hot hard cocks can't even fit in their wife! Don't believe them? Maybe they will show you, NO HOMO! And don't you say nothin' about "sounds like little Jerry's trying too hard," because the only thing that's trying TOO HARD around here is JERRY'S SUPER-HARD COCK, trying to get INSIDE HIS WIFE!
More than simply talking with employees about his wife in a sexual manner, on at least one occasion, Falwell shared a photo of his wife wearing what appeared to be a French maid costume, according to a longtime Liberty employee with firsthand knowledge of the image and the fallout that followed.
Still very normal, especially for the president of a very serious Bible college. "Here is my wife in a French maid costume. Should I tell you the part about MY COCK again?"
Falwell intended to send the image to his and Becki's personal trainer, Ben Crosswhite, as a "thank you" for helping his wife achieve her fitness goals, the employee said.
OK, maybe this is a little bit weird. We have only had a personal trainer for about six minutes, but we don't think it's customary for married hetero men to send trainers slutty pictures of their wives in order to "thank them" for being such good heterosexual personal trainers. Gym bros are free to correct us, but until they do, we're gonna say that's not a thing. You know, unless Jerry 'n' Ben have a rapport that involves exchanging sexxx pictures with each other. Hey, maybe they jerk off together, but not in the gay way! IT'S FINE, IT'S CALLED MALE BONDING, OK?
Hey pop quiz for anybody who knows Jerry 'n' Ben! Are their phones password-protected? Now you know why. ALLEGEDLY.
In the course of texting, Falwell accidentally sent the message to several other people, necessitating a cleanup.
What ... what kind of "cleanup"?
In a statement, Falwell denied this. "I never had any picture of Becki Falwell dressed in a French maid uniform, and never sent such a non-existent photo to Ben Crosswhite."
Well that is a very particular denial. Maybe she was dressed in something else! Maybe she was dressed in her birthday suit! Maybe it wasn't Becki Falwell! And also too, the Politico article says right there that he didn't send the pic to Ben Crosswhite, but that he meant to.
I'm into havin' sex, I ain't into makin' love, So come give me a hug if you into gettin' rubbed, You can find me in the club ... ALLEGEDLY!
Anyway, Jerry Falwell Jr. denies the existence of all pictures, even the pictures Politico included in its piece, like for instance of Jerry out at Da Club (like all Christian college presidents) with his son Trey. The WALL club, specifically, which is down the street from the hostel Trey co-owns with dad's poolboy, which Ambrosino has reported es muy gay-friendly:
In a statement on August 21, Jerry Falwell denied the existence of any photo of him at the club. "There was no picture snapped of me at WALL nightclub or any other nightclub," Falwell wrote. "I'm sure you already knew that though."
When told that I had obtained a photo of him for this article, Falwell said I was "terribly mistaken." "If you show me the picture, I can probably help you out," he wrote. "I think you are making some incorrect assumptions, or have been told false things or are seeing something that was photo--shopped."
After I sent him the photo, as well as a photo of Trey at Wall, Falwell responded: "I never asked anyone to get rid of any pictures on the internet of me and I never have seen the picture you claim is of me below. If the person in the picture is me, it was likely photo-shopped." In a second email sent 23 minutes later, Falwell wrote: "But the bigger question, Brandon, is why would I want a picture like that taken down if I had seen it?"
OK.
@POLITICOMag Jerry Falwell has gone on record denying the existence of any risqué photos *of himself*. (Read the pi… https://t.co/90kmGowaIF
— Brandon Ambrosino (@Brandon Ambrosino)1568024969.0
Hate it when people Photoshop Jerry Falwell Jr., the president of a college where you're not allowed to drink or dance or **** or trip the light fantastic -- into the club scene in Miami all the time. That's just rude.
