Among the many things I’m thankful for this Thanksgiving are the absurdities found in politics and governing. They are the butter on my bread, the scotch in my water and the gravy on my mashed potatoes.
I realize we’re now neck deep in absurdities. But occasionally, something happens that rises above the regular grind of jaw-dropping developments.
Last weekend’s Trump rally in Fort Dodge was a Thanksgiving miracle.
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Among the Republican luminaries warming up the crowd for Donald Trump was state Sen. Mike Sexton, R-Dagobah. He decided to close out his remarks by doing an impersonation of Yoda. Yep.
For those of you not familiar with the ways of the Star Wars multiverse, Yoda is a Jedi master. He’s short, green and has a unique way of speaking. Don’t underestimate his skills with a lightsaber.
Yoda is famous for saying “Do or do not. There is no try.”
Sexton should have picked “do not.”
“In the time I have left, one of my great heroes, the great Jedi master himself, master Yoda,” Sexton told the crowd assembled in the Fort Dodge High School gym.
“Mmm the dark side is very powerful in Biden. Crooked is he. Your country, he does not care,” Sexton said in a voice that was supposed to be Yoda, but sounded more like the comedian Bobcat Goldthwait or maybe Grover from Sesame Street.
“The force is strong in Trump … Caucus for him you shall. For without his victory, all hope is lost,” Sexton said.
The next sound you heard was Luke Skywalker firing up his lightsaber.
“The Cringe is strong with this one,” Mark Hamill, the actor who played Skywalker, posted on X in response to an online video of Sexton impersonating a Jedi.
“Losing my lunch, I am,” Hamill posted a little while later, again reacting to the video.
Wow, Sexton was dispatched by Luke Skywalker faster than some stormtrooper who can’t shoot straight. Senator, it seems the force is not with you. The emperor will not be pleased.
Later at the rally, Trump discussed a sex act he doesn’t like. No transcript will be allowed in an Iowa public school.
Then, on Monday, Gov. Kim Reynolds renewed the tradition of pardoning turkeys on the lawn at Terrace Hill just before Thanksgiving.
According to the governor’s office, the turkeys are named Freedom and Flourish, in keeping with Iowa’s new state slogan, “Freedom to Flourish.” It’s catching on like gangbusters.
But the Des Moines Register’s Stephen Gruber-Miller carved a little deeper and interviewed Ava Moline, a 15-year-old who has been raising these turkeys for six years. She named them Jack and Diane. Wait.
So Jack and Diane, two American turkeys growing up in the heartland, were forced to change their names in the service of promoting our state slogan? What about their liberties and rights?
Were the turkeys’ parents informed about the new names they’ll be using? Does this run afoul (a fowl?) of Senate File 496? If we refuse to call them Freedom and Flourish, are we exercising our right to free speech?
The governor’s pardon says the turkeys are “free to roam.” Head for the border, Jack and Diane. Remember, life goes on, long after the thrill of living is gone.
(319) 398-8262; todd.dorman@thegazette.com
www.thegazette.com
I realize we’re now neck deep in absurdities. But occasionally, something happens that rises above the regular grind of jaw-dropping developments.
Last weekend’s Trump rally in Fort Dodge was a Thanksgiving miracle.
ADVERTISING
Among the Republican luminaries warming up the crowd for Donald Trump was state Sen. Mike Sexton, R-Dagobah. He decided to close out his remarks by doing an impersonation of Yoda. Yep.
For those of you not familiar with the ways of the Star Wars multiverse, Yoda is a Jedi master. He’s short, green and has a unique way of speaking. Don’t underestimate his skills with a lightsaber.
Yoda is famous for saying “Do or do not. There is no try.”
Sexton should have picked “do not.”
“In the time I have left, one of my great heroes, the great Jedi master himself, master Yoda,” Sexton told the crowd assembled in the Fort Dodge High School gym.
“Mmm the dark side is very powerful in Biden. Crooked is he. Your country, he does not care,” Sexton said in a voice that was supposed to be Yoda, but sounded more like the comedian Bobcat Goldthwait or maybe Grover from Sesame Street.
“The force is strong in Trump … Caucus for him you shall. For without his victory, all hope is lost,” Sexton said.
The next sound you heard was Luke Skywalker firing up his lightsaber.
“The Cringe is strong with this one,” Mark Hamill, the actor who played Skywalker, posted on X in response to an online video of Sexton impersonating a Jedi.
“Losing my lunch, I am,” Hamill posted a little while later, again reacting to the video.
Wow, Sexton was dispatched by Luke Skywalker faster than some stormtrooper who can’t shoot straight. Senator, it seems the force is not with you. The emperor will not be pleased.
Later at the rally, Trump discussed a sex act he doesn’t like. No transcript will be allowed in an Iowa public school.
Then, on Monday, Gov. Kim Reynolds renewed the tradition of pardoning turkeys on the lawn at Terrace Hill just before Thanksgiving.
According to the governor’s office, the turkeys are named Freedom and Flourish, in keeping with Iowa’s new state slogan, “Freedom to Flourish.” It’s catching on like gangbusters.
But the Des Moines Register’s Stephen Gruber-Miller carved a little deeper and interviewed Ava Moline, a 15-year-old who has been raising these turkeys for six years. She named them Jack and Diane. Wait.
So Jack and Diane, two American turkeys growing up in the heartland, were forced to change their names in the service of promoting our state slogan? What about their liberties and rights?
Were the turkeys’ parents informed about the new names they’ll be using? Does this run afoul (a fowl?) of Senate File 496? If we refuse to call them Freedom and Flourish, are we exercising our right to free speech?
The governor’s pardon says the turkeys are “free to roam.” Head for the border, Jack and Diane. Remember, life goes on, long after the thrill of living is gone.
(319) 398-8262; todd.dorman@thegazette.com
Opinion: Yoda, Jack and Diane’s Thanksgiving miracle in Iowa
Sexton was dispatched by Luke Skywalker faster than some stormtrooper who can’t shoot straight.
www.thegazette.com
