Other kids’ parents are cray cray!...(long story of teen drama)

[Menace Sockeyes]

Get a load of this story: So, my 16 year old teenage stepson is high functioning autistic. He struggles and just barely gets by in school (except in band). But like most autistics, he gets fixated on things and will have meltdowns where he will be self-destructive and badgering to get his way. His brother and my daughter make his feelings of inferiority worse since they are both honor roll students. He has twice been caught with dime bags of weed by my wife. The second time she was tipped off by his friend, our neighbor’s son, that he had been skipping study hall and smoking in his car. Well, my wife went to the car when she knew where he was out at, finds out that he has some, AND he’s with a Senior girl from band he calls his girlfriend. Odd way to meet, but she grounds him from being able to use the car for the month. In the meantime, my wife says to the girl that she is welcome to come to the house sometimes to see him.

Cut to a month later. My wife and the girl get along. Turns out the girl is also high functioning autistic. The girl seems to get on his case about the right things and he’s not been skipping. The mom of this girl has taken them out together, bought him nice clothes, and other items. But this mom gets all defensive about her daughter’s condition AND his. She says her daughter is normal and starts telling my wife he doesn’t really have the problems my wife had talked about. She’s known him a month and has spent time with him 3 or 4 times, but whatever.

Well, last week he skips part of study hall and lunch. Turns out that they were together and that they walked the few blocks to his Dad’s house and “had lunch” alone during that time. Alarm bells, right? Well, same friend that informed my wife about the pot, told his mom that our stepson was bragging that he was getting some from her. So my wife calls her mom to let her know, thinking that she should know and be vigilant if they’re together. But this mom gets all offended, shares this text with her daughter, and decides to call out my wife as overbearing. My wife asks about birth control and this mom says her daughter can make her own decisions and she will support her in any consequences, but that she would tell her if she needed it.

The next day, the girl breaks up with him saying that she can’t take how my wife “doesn’t like her”. My wife contacts this Mom trying to explain that this is not the case, she just doesn’t want a grandchild on their hands, etc. This mom accuses my wife of thinking her daughter is a “slut”, and freaks out about how her daughter has told her she’s a virgin, and she trusts her, and her daughter wouldn’t lie to her, etc. Turns out this girl is seeing one of his friends now, a couple days later and her mom texts my wife saying she is seeing this kid because “his parents respect their privacy”. Literally, all my wife ever asked for was to have an adult in the home, and that they keep their door open. They could even lay together on their beds. WTF??? Parents really let their 16 year olds alone? Ones with a history of bad decisions? This girl is going to get knocked up in the next year. Am I right?

 

[ggmditka]

Consider yourself lucky you got rid of the young slut and the young slut's mom in one fell swoop. It's a win win.

 

[Herkmeister]

Stupid cannot be fixed. Be grateful she gone.

 

[L. Wade Childress]

Pic?

 

[millah_22]

1. Your wife is a cock block.

2. No pic of your step son's sbxg or sbxgm?

 

[anon_01irjibf16qqj]

I can't take anyone serious that says cray cray.

 

[Menace Sockeyes]

I can't take anyone serious that says cray cray.

Nor should you. Not an overly serious subject. The stupidity of some parents just baffles me.

 

[Wendy79]

Consider yourself lucky you got rid of the young slut and the young slut's mom in one fell swoop. It's a win win.

Women today are not slut shamed the way they were back in the day.

 

[BringIt2017]

So my wife calls her mom to let her know, thinking that she should know and be vigilant if they’re together. But this mom gets all offended, shares this text with her daughter, and decides to call out my wife as overbearing. My wife asks about birth control and this mom says her daughter can make her own decisions and she will support her in any consequences, but that she would tell her if she needed it.

So was this a phone call or a text?

If these conversations were happening over text it contributes to a lot of these problems. If I got texts like this from someone I didn’t know very well (whom I disagreed with about my child’s mental disorder) I would probably jump to some conclusions. The subject alone to a girls parents is immediately going to put lots of people on the defensive.

And I’m a reasonable man.... I’m not surprised at all to hear a mom didn’t handle this well.

I don’t think your wife did anything wrong though other than potentially using a poor method of communication.

 

[Menace Sockeyes]

So was this a phone call or a text?

If these conversations were happening over text it contributes to a lot of these problems. If I got texts like this from someone I didn’t know very well (whom I disagreed with about my child’s mental disorder) I would probably jump to some conclusions. The subject alone to a girls parents is immediately going to put lots of people on the defensive.

And I’m a reasonable man.... I’m not surprised at all to hear a mom didn’t handle this well.

I don’t think your wife did anything wrong though other than potentially using a poor method of communication.

Good catch. It was both. It was a phone call and a follow up text. You have a point about text messages, and I did think of that. But I read my wife’s texts and they seemed pretty innocuous to me.

 

[bdg8]

So your son was getting laid and high over lunch ?

I miss being young

 

[3boysmom]

How did her conversation with your son about condoms go? Assuming he wasn’t lying to his friends. As a mom of boys I have not concerned myself with the birth control status of their girlfriends, I’ve preached that they need to assume they aren’t on any and are ovulating. They need to be responsible for themselves

 

[Menace Sockeyes]

How did her conversation with your son about condoms go? Assuming he wasn’t lying to his friends. As a mom of boys I have not concerned myself with the birth control status of their girlfriends, I’ve preached that they need to assume they aren’t on any and are ovulating. They need to be responsible for themselves

Oh, she’s had that talk PLENTY. She informed him that he can get them at the health clinic six blocks down the hill from us. She found one in his car too. We were at least thankful for that. The problem is that, with his disability, he’s even more clueless about the consequences of his actions than your typical teenager. We were hoping BOTH would take some measures so we double our chances of avoiding a pregnancy. Considering his choices, we figured they would appreciate being informed.

 

[THE_DEVIL]

The first mistake was your wife not inviting crazy mom over to the house for a threesome before talking about the kids situation. If done correctly this entire situation may have turned out better for all involved (including the kids). As parents you need to get your priorities straight before instilling those priorities on your children.

 

[BrunoMars420]

I can't take anyone serious that says cray cray.

I tend to take people more serious when these words are used.

 

[torbee]

Get a load of this story: So, my 16 year old teenage stepson is high functioning autistic. He struggles and just barely gets by in school (except in band). But like most autistics, he gets fixated on things and will have meltdowns where he will be self-destructive and badgering to get his way. His brother and my daughter make his feelings of inferiority worse since they are both honor roll students. He has twice been caught with dime bags of weed by my wife. The second time she was tipped off by his friend, our neighbor’s son, that he had been skipping study hall and smoking in his car. Well, my wife went to the car when she knew where he was out at, finds out that he has some, AND he’s with a Senior girl from band he calls his girlfriend. Odd way to meet, but she grounds him from being able to use the car for the month. In the meantime, my wife says to the girl that she is welcome to come to the house sometimes to see him.

Cut to a month later. My wife and the girl get along. Turns out the girl is also high functioning autistic. The girl seems to get on his case about the right things and he’s not been skipping. The mom of this girl has taken them out together, bought him nice clothes, and other items. But this mom gets all defensive about her daughter’s condition AND his. She says her daughter is normal and starts telling my wife he doesn’t really have the problems my wife had talked about. She’s known him a month and has spent time with him 3 or 4 times, but whatever.

Well, last week he skips part of study hall and lunch. Turns out that they were together and that they walked the few blocks to his Dad’s house and “had lunch” alone during that time. Alarm bells, right? Well, same friend that informed my wife about the pot, told his mom that our stepson was bragging that he was getting some from her. So my wife calls her mom to let her know, thinking that she should know and be vigilant if they’re together. But this mom gets all offended, shares this text with her daughter, and decides to call out my wife as overbearing. My wife asks about birth control and this mom says her daughter can make her own decisions and she will support her in any consequences, but that she would tell her if she needed it.

The next day, the girl breaks up with him saying that she can’t take how my wife “doesn’t like her”. My wife contacts this Mom trying to explain that this is not the case, she just doesn’t want a grandchild on their hands, etc. This mom accuses my wife of thinking her daughter is a “slut”, and freaks out about how her daughter has told her she’s a virgin, and she trusts her, and her daughter wouldn’t lie to her, etc. Turns out this girl is seeing one of his friends now, a couple days later and her mom texts my wife saying she is seeing this kid because “his parents respect their privacy”. Literally, all my wife ever asked for was to have an adult in the home, and that they keep their door open. They could even lay together on their beds. WTF??? Parents really let their 16 year olds alone? Ones with a history of bad decisions? This girl is going to get knocked up in the next year. Am I right?

I agree with the others that say you dodged a bullet. Sucks short term for your stepson, but the ex-girlfriend’s mom sounds like a nightmare.

 

[Menace Sockeyes]

The first mistake was your wife not inviting crazy mom over to the house for a threesome before talking about the kids situation. If done correctly this entire situation may have turned out better for all involved (including the kids). As parents you need to get your priorities straight before instilling those priorities on your children.

Do. Not. Want. Is there some fetish of hot women with ugly ones? That would be my wife with this chick.

I tend to take people more serious when these words are used.

I tend not to care about joke titles on threads, but don’t take someone serious if they’re stupid enough to support Trump, for example. To each their own.

 

[torbee]

The first mistake was your wife not inviting crazy mom over to the house for a threesome before talking about the kids situation. If done correctly this entire situation may have turned out better for all involved (including the kids). As parents you need to get your priorities straight before instilling those priorities on your children.

The Devil again proves to have the smartest,
most reasonable take.

 

[hawkbirch]

Oh, she’s had that talk PLENTY. She informed him that he can get them at the health clinic six blocks down the hill from us. She found one in his car too. We were at least thankful for that. The problem is that, with his disability, he’s even more clueless about the consequences of his actions than your typical teenager. We were hoping BOTH would take some measures so we double our chances of avoiding a pregnancy. Considering his choices, we figured they would appreciate being informed.

Buy them for him. Take a banana and show him how to use it. It's great to say this is where you get condoms. It's not so great if he's too embarrassed to buy them or doesn't know how to use them correctly.

And as the mother of daughters, I'd be thankful that a mother with a son called me to let me know I better update my birth control talk with my daughter.

 

[jellyfish10]

I tend to take people more serious when these words are used.

Of course you would.

 

[torbee]

Buy them for him. Take a banana and show him how to use it. It's great to say this is where you get condoms. It's not so great if he's too embarrassed to buy them or doesn't know how to use them correctly.

And as the mother of daughters, I'd be thankful that a mother with a son called me to let me know I better update my birth control talk with my daughter.

It’s Menace’s wife’s kid. Better make it an eggplant instead.

 

[jellyfish10]

Buy them for him. Take a banana and show him how to use it. It's great to say this is where you get condoms. It's not so great if he's too embarrassed to buy them or doesn't know how to use them correctly.

And as the mother of daughters, I'd be thankful that a mother with a son called me to let me know I better update my birth control talk with my daughter.

We started talking to our daughter when she was young about sex and the responsibility that comes along with it. Even then, she felt the need to lie about it until I caught her in the act. That was heartbreaking. I’m not sure what caused her to be dishonest but as young parents we wanted to make sure our daughter knew the risks and we still failed.

 

[Menace Sockeyes]

We started talking to our daughter when she was young about sex and the responsibility that comes along with it. Even then, she felt the need to lie about it until I caught her in the act. That was heartbreaking. I’m not sure what caused her to be dishonest but as young parents we wanted to make sure our daughter knew the risks and we still failed.

Thanks for sharing this. That’s the thing: You can do your job educating your kids, but 16 (or 17 in her case) is too young to JUST educate them and give them full freedom of where and when they can be together. It’s a very tough line to walk, and my wife did it pretty damn well. Plenty of public places they could go, for example. We all remember being young and dumb. My wife had him at 18. I had my first daughter at 21 and was probably fortunate not to at 18 (strong pullout game...oh, and birth control on my gf’s part).

 

[Herkmeister]

My parents never talked to their only son about sex. From what I recall, he did not get an early start. Apparently it is more difficult for ugly children to get an early jump sexually.

 

[Herkmeister]

I can't take anyone serious that says cray cray.

Even when used by journalists referring to Trump?

 

[jellyfish10]

Thanks for sharing this. That’s the thing: You can do your job educating your kids, but 16 (or 17 in her case) is too young to JUST educate them and give them full freedom of where and when they can be together. It’s a very tough line to walk, and my wife did it pretty damn well. Plenty of public places they could go, for example. We all remember being young and dumb. My wife had him at 18. I had my first daughter at 21 and was probably fortunate not to at 18 (strong pullout game...oh, and birth control on my gf’s part).

You’re welcome. I always told myself I wasn’t going to be a naive parent yet there I was. Obviously pregnancy is a concern, but so is the emotional reaction from sex at that age. I think that is so often overlooked when talking to our kids about sex.

 

[goldmom]

Nor should you. Not an overly serious subject. The stupidity of some parents just baffles me.

Careful. You ALMOST sound like a conservative.
Regardless, thank your (and stepson's) lucky stars that those crazies have moved on, unless you want to be called Grandpa.

 

[Menace Sockeyes]

Careful. You ALMOST sound like a conservative.
Regardless, thank your (and stepson's) lucky stars that those crazies have moved on, unless you want to be called Grandpa.

^ Classic case of confusing conservative behavior with conservative politics though. Good parenting lies somewhere between the two extremes (i.e. the two sets of parents on Wife Swap). And it's certainly not all a black-and-white world out there.

 

[3boysmom]

We started talking to our daughter when she was young about sex and the responsibility that comes along with it. Even then, she felt the need to lie about it until I caught her in the act. That was heartbreaking. I’m not sure what caused her to be dishonest but as young parents we wanted to make sure our daughter knew the risks and we still failed.

My mom told me to tell her if I was having sex then proceeded to talk to her sister about never letting her daughter out of her sight when her daughter did that. No chance in hell I was going to tell her. Just like Birch’s advice, take your daughter and put her on birth control or provide her with condoms without being expected to be told she needs them. And both would probably be better.

 

[naturalmwa]

Your boy needs to beat up the neighbor boy and never tell you if he’s dating again. Why are either of you talking to the other mom when it’s your son who either will or won’t get the girl pregnant. Focus inwardly is my unqualified advice.

 

[Brian_Fantana]

All I gathered from this is The neighbor kid is a dB and your wife needs to relax

 

[herkyhawk00]

One thing is for certain, teenagers are liars. Blind trust as a parent just makes you blind.

 

[THE_DEVIL]

The Devil again proves to have the smartest,
most reasonable take.

Thanks Torbee. I try to be a helpful being.

 

[Menace Sockeyes]

Your boy needs to beat up the neighbor boy and never tell you if he’s dating again. Why are either of you talking to the other mom when it’s your son who either will or won’t get the girl pregnant. Focus inwardly is my unqualified advice.

The neighbor boy that's his friend is exactly the type of kid we hope he can become. He was born with FAS and adopted by our neighbor (a civil rights lawyer) who is friends with my wife. He used to be a screw up at 15 and 16, skipping classes and nearly flunking, caught out past curfew. But a lot of guidance and good parenting on his mom's part has him at 17 going on 18 in a stable relationship with a good girl (who is in college and turning into a smoke show...no pic), he is in a trade school program that will have him in a building trade apprenticeship in another year, and has become the responsible voice of his friends. He also clearly has a thing for my wife and has always wanted to be on her good side.

 

[naturalmwa]

The neighbor boy that's his friend is exactly the type of kid we hope he can become. He was born with FAS and adopted by our neighbor (a civil rights lawyer) who is friends with my wife. He used to be a screw up at 15 and 16, skipping classes and nearly flunking, caught out past curfew. But a lot of guidance and good parenting on his mom's part has him at 17 going on 18 in a stable relationship with a good girl (who is in college and turning into a smoke show...no pic), he is in a trade school program that will have him in a building trade apprenticeship in another year, and has become the responsible voice of his friends. He also clearly has a thing for my wife and has always wanted to be on her good side.

I still think your son would be in the right if he punched him in the throat. Who does your son have who he can trust? Not his friend, not his parents, and now not his girl. Sounds like a lonely time for your kid who likely already had a hard time with relationships. I hope he’s good looking. That would be some proof of a loving god.

 

[unIowa]

Buy them for him. Take a banana and show him how to use it. It's great to say this is where you get condoms. It's not so great if he's too embarrassed to buy them or doesn't know how to use them correctly.

And as the mother of daughters, I'd be thankful that a mother with a son called me to let me know I better update my birth control talk with my daughter.

We started talking to our daughter when she was young about sex and the responsibility that comes along with it. Even then, she felt the need to lie about it until I caught her in the act. That was heartbreaking. I’m not sure what caused her to be dishonest but as young parents we wanted to make sure our daughter knew the risks and we still failed.

You caught your daughter in the act of getting railed...oh nelly, how did you handle that???

 

[Menace Sockeyes]

I still think your son would be in the right if he punched him in the throat. Who does your son have who he can trust? Not his friend, not his parents, and now not his girl. Sounds like a lonely time for your kid who likely already had a hard time with relationships. I hope he’s good looking. That would be some proof of a loving god.

He has us to "trust" when he actually admits to his mistakes (He never does. Nothing is his fault). And he has many cousins, as well as my nephews, as close friends too. It is a rough time, and a lot of it his own making. Sadly, his disability will likely always doom his relationships. Not giving up, but just being a realist. He's already exhibiting the signs of paranoid personality that led his grandfather to being medically discharged as an Air Force MP.

 

[jellyfish10]

You caught your daughter in the act of getting railed...oh nelly, how did you handle that???

I already hated the kid prior to this. Disrespectful, arrogant, womanizer. I yelled at him to get the fug outta my house. It is no small feat that I didn’t put my hands on him.

Here’s the fun part though. This POS kid? His dad is who my x was having her most recent affair with before I split...I found out the night of their senior prom. So that was cool.

 

[unIowa]

You caught your daughter in the act of getting railed...oh nelly, how did you handle that???

I already hated the kid prior to this. Disrespectful, arrogant, womanizer. I yelled at him to get the fug outta my house. It is no small feat that I didn’t put my hands on him.

Here’s the fun part though. This POS kid? His dad is who my x was having her most recent affair with before I split...I found out the night of their senior prom. So that was cool.

Yikes....awful, you probably should have murdered him.

 

[unIowa]

Get a load of this story: So, my 16 year old teenage stepson is high functioning autistic. He struggles and just barely gets by in school (except in band). But like most autistics, he gets fixated on things and will have meltdowns where he will be self-destructive and badgering to get his way. His brother and my daughter make his feelings of inferiority worse since they are both honor roll students. He has twice been caught with dime bags of weed by my wife. The second time she was tipped off by his friend, our neighbor’s son, that he had been skipping study hall and smoking in his car. Well, my wife went to the car when she knew where he was out at, finds out that he has some, AND he’s with a Senior girl from band he calls his girlfriend. Odd way to meet, but she grounds him from being able to use the car for the month. In the meantime, my wife says to the girl that she is welcome to come to the house sometimes to see him.

Cut to a month later. My wife and the girl get along. Turns out the girl is also high functioning autistic. The girl seems to get on his case about the right things and he’s not been skipping. The mom of this girl has taken them out together, bought him nice clothes, and other items. But this mom gets all defensive about her daughter’s condition AND his. She says her daughter is normal and starts telling my wife he doesn’t really have the problems my wife had talked about. She’s known him a month and has spent time with him 3 or 4 times, but whatever.

Well, last week he skips part of study hall and lunch. Turns out that they were together and that they walked the few blocks to his Dad’s house and “had lunch” alone during that time. Alarm bells, right? Well, same friend that informed my wife about the pot, told his mom that our stepson was bragging that he was getting some from her. So my wife calls her mom to let her know, thinking that she should know and be vigilant if they’re together. But this mom gets all offended, shares this text with her daughter, and decides to call out my wife as overbearing. My wife asks about birth control and this mom says her daughter can make her own decisions and she will support her in any consequences, but that she would tell her if she needed it.

The next day, the girl breaks up with him saying that she can’t take how my wife “doesn’t like her”. My wife contacts this Mom trying to explain that this is not the case, she just doesn’t want a grandchild on their hands, etc. This mom accuses my wife of thinking her daughter is a “slut”, and freaks out about how her daughter has told her she’s a virgin, and she trusts her, and her daughter wouldn’t lie to her, etc. Turns out this girl is seeing one of his friends now, a couple days later and her mom texts my wife saying she is seeing this kid because “his parents respect their privacy”. Literally, all my wife ever asked for was to have an adult in the home, and that they keep their door open. They could even lay together on their beds. WTF??? Parents really let their 16 year olds alone? Ones with a history of bad decisions? This girl is going to get knocked up in the next year. Am I right?

Sounds like this mom has had the big-A talk with her daughter...anal.