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Protocol for encountering topless sunbathers

Lone Clone

Lone Clone

HR King
May 29, 2001
111,256
21,404
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Yesterday at the beach, a young woman with a spectacular body and a very small bikini paraded around for awhile to make sure everybody saw her. Then she got onto her chaise lounge and removed her top.

I was tempted to go over and tell her she really got her money's worth on the boob job. I mean, she laid flat, but they didn't. However, I thought that might not be proper behavior.

I saw one guy immediately turn his chair so he was looking away, clearly so he wouldn't have to keep trying to not look at her. I simply kept trying not to be seen looking at her. The women on the beach spent a lot of time furtively talking to one another.

Two points (no pun intended):

1. Nudity on this particular beach is technically illegal. You don't see it often. I do not know if any arrests, though.

2. Taking a pic would definitely have not been appropriate. Sorry. Not sorry for you guys. Sorry for me.
 
Originally posted by Lone Clone:
Yesterday at the beach, a young woman with a spectacular body and a very small bikini paraded around for awhile to make sure everybody saw her. Then she got onto her chaise lounge and removed her top.

I was tempted to go over and tell her she really got her money's worth on the boob job. I mean, she laid flat, but they didn't. However, I thought that might not be proper behavior.

I saw one guy immediately turn his chair so he was looking away, clearly so he wouldn't have to keep trying to not look at her. I simply kept trying not to be seen looking at her. The women on the beach spent a lot of time furtively talking to one another.

Two points (no pun intended):

1. Nudity on this particular beach is technically illegal. You don't see it often. I do not know if any arrests, though.

2. Taking a pic would definitely have not been appropriate. Sorry. Not sorry for you guys. Sorry for me.
Click to expand...
I would suggest "accidentally" spilling a freezing glass of icy pina colada on her back. Then helping her clean up the mess.
 
iAF3giPSbOFcu.gif
 
I'm not saying you should consider rape, but this is one of those classic "she was asking for it by how she was dressed" defense opportunities.


Posted from Rivals Mobile
 
Originally posted by torbee:

Originally posted by Lone Clone:
Yesterday at the beach, a young woman with a spectacular body and a very small bikini paraded around for awhile to make sure everybody saw her. Then she got onto her chaise lounge and removed her top.

I was tempted to go over and tell her she really got her money's worth on the boob job. I mean, she laid flat, but they didn't. However, I thought that might not be proper behavior.

I saw one guy immediately turn his chair so he was looking away, clearly so he wouldn't have to keep trying to not look at her. I simply kept trying not to be seen looking at her. The women on the beach spent a lot of time furtively talking to one another.

Two points (no pun intended):

1. Nudity on this particular beach is technically illegal. You don't see it often. I do not know if any arrests, though.

2. Taking a pic would definitely have not been appropriate. Sorry. Not sorry for you guys. Sorry for me.
Click to expand...
I would suggest "accidentally" spilling a freezing glass of icy pina colada on her back. Then helping her clean up the mess.
Click to expand...
Wouldn't work. For one thing, I don't drink fru-fru girly drinks. For another, she was lying on her back -- this was sort of the point(s).
 
If snapping a pic seemed inappropriate, just sit next to her and start masturbating.
 
Originally posted by bdg8:

If boobs present themselves, you have to look. Stare away.
Click to expand...
My feeling is that if a woman goes into a public place and bares her breasts, she has no reason to be offended if someone looks at them. She was very proud of her purchase and wanted to show it off, IMHO.

She would have no reason to be irritated if she had seen me looking at her. She might object to the puddle of drool, but that's a matter of aesthetics.

Now, whether Mrs. LC would take such an enlightened view is another matter. I wasn't really so much worried about the topless lady catching me as I was worried about my spouse catching me. Although I did nudge her and say, "wow, look at those."
 
Originally posted by Lone Clone:

Originally posted by bdg8:

If boobs present themselves, you have to look.  Stare away.
Click to expand...
My feeling is that if a woman goes into a public place and bares her breasts, she has no reason to be offended if someone looks at them. She was very proud of her purchase and wanted to show it off, IMHO. 

She would have no reason to be irritated if she had seen me looking at her. She might object to the puddle of drool, but that's a matter of aesthetics.

Now, whether Mrs. LC would take such an enlightened view is another matter. I wasn't really so much worried about the topless lady catching me as I was worried about my spouse catching me. Although I did nudge her and say, "wow, look at those."
Click to expand...

Correct. You still need to introduce yourself on the (likely) chance she has daddy issues.

Posted from Rivals Mobile
 
Originally posted by KennyPowers_96:
Originally posted by Lone Clone:

Originally posted by bdg8:

If boobs present themselves, you have to look. Stare away.
Click to expand...
My feeling is that if a woman goes into a public place and bares her breasts, she has no reason to be offended if someone looks at them. She was very proud of her purchase and wanted to show it off, IMHO.Â

She would have no reason to be irritated if she had seen me looking at her. She might object to the puddle of drool, but that's a matter of aesthetics.

Now, whether Mrs. LC would take such an enlightened view is another matter. I wasn't really so much worried about the topless lady catching me as I was worried about my spouse catching me. Although I did nudge her and say, "wow, look at those."
Click to expand...

Correct. You still need to introduce yourself on the (likely) chance she has granddaddy issues.

Posted from Rivals Mobile
Click to expand...
FYP for more accuracy
 
Originally posted by Lone Clone:
Yesterday at the beach, a young woman with a spectacular body and a very small bikini paraded around for awhile to make sure everybody saw her. Then she got onto her chaise lounge and removed her top.

I was tempted to go over and tell her she really got her money's worth on the boob job. I mean, she laid flat, but they didn't. However, I thought that might not be proper behavior.

I saw one guy immediately turn his chair so he was looking away, clearly so he wouldn't have to keep trying to not look at her. I simply kept trying not to be seen looking at her. The women on the beach spent a lot of time furtively talking to one another.

Two points (no pun intended):

1. Nudity on this particular beach is technically illegal. You don't see it often. I do not know if any arrests, though.

2. Taking a pic would definitely have not been appropriate. Sorry. Not sorry for you guys. Sorry for me.


You type pretty well with one hand.
wink.r191677.gif
Click to expand...
 
Originally posted by bdg8:

If boobs present themselves, you have to look. Stare away.
Click to expand...
Duh. This is the right answer unless you wife or significant other is there. In that case you still must look but a modicum of discretion is in order.
 
Originally posted by Lone Clone:
Yesterday at the beach, a young woman with a spectacular body and a very small bikini paraded around for awhile to make sure everybody saw her. Then she got onto her chaise lounge and removed her top.

I was tempted to go over and tell her she really got her money's worth on the boob job. I mean, she laid flat, but they didn't. However, I thought that might not be proper behavior.

I saw one guy immediately turn his chair so he was looking away, clearly so he wouldn't have to keep trying to not look at her. I simply kept trying not to be seen looking at her. The women on the beach spent a lot of time furtively talking to one another.

Two points (no pun intended):

1. Nudity on this particular beach is technically illegal. You don't see it often. I do not know if any arrests, though.

2. Taking a pic would definitely have not been appropriate. Sorry. Not sorry for you guys. Sorry for me.
Click to expand...
If she doesn't want her picture taken, she should stop reflecting light. You should have felt free to use your photon-catching device.
 
Originally posted by wildcatdad:
Originally posted by Lone Clone:
Yesterday at the beach, a young woman with a spectacular body and a very small bikini paraded around for awhile to make sure everybody saw her. Then she got onto her chaise lounge and removed her top.

I was tempted to go over and tell her she really got her money's worth on the boob job. I mean, she laid flat, but they didn't. However, I thought that might not be proper behavior.

I saw one guy immediately turn his chair so he was looking away, clearly so he wouldn't have to keep trying to not look at her. I simply kept trying not to be seen looking at her. The women on the beach spent a lot of time furtively talking to one another.

Two points (no pun intended):

1. Nudity on this particular beach is technically illegal. You don't see it often. I do not know if any arrests, though.

2. Taking a pic would definitely have not been appropriate. Sorry. Not sorry for you guys. Sorry for me.


You type pretty well with one hand.
wink.r191677.gif
Click to expand...
Click to expand...
nice
 
Lone....
At out age there is no "proper" etiquette protocol required. Hellsbells man...we are OLD!
I think it would be quite proper and fitting to give the lady a "thumbs up", gawk really long time and then (with cigar in mouth and drink in hand) approach her and compliment her on her fine titties.
It's what she wants. If it wasn't...she wouldn't have had them made by man. Keeeerist Lone.....it ain't your fault your not blind.
 
Originally posted by Lone Clone:
Yesterday at the beach, a young woman with a spectacular body and a very small bikini paraded around for awhile to make sure everybody saw her. Then she got onto her chaise lounge and removed her top.

I was tempted to go over and tell her she really got her money's worth on the boob job. I mean, she laid flat, but they didn't. However, I thought that might not be proper behavior.

I saw one guy immediately turn his chair so he was looking away, clearly so he wouldn't have to keep trying to not look at her. I simply kept trying not to be seen looking at her. The women on the beach spent a lot of time furtively talking to one another.

Two points (no pun intended):

1. Nudity on this particular beach is technically illegal. You don't see it often. I do not know if any arrests, though.

2. Taking a pic would definitely have not been appropriate. Sorry. Not sorry for you guys. Sorry for me.
Click to expand...
Where the hell are you?
 
I would have marched right over to her lil trick ass and told her to tell her boobs to quit staring at my eyes.

And also since you were in a public place and she was an adult there is ZERO reason you could not take a picture.
 
Same thing happened on our honeymoon. This hot blonde (not wife and no pic) sat a few chairs from us and she took her top off. They were fake but amazing.
Posted from Rivals Mobile
 
Originally posted by Hawk in SEC Country:

Originally posted by Lone Clone:
Yesterday at the beach, a young woman with a spectacular body and a very small bikini paraded around for awhile to make sure everybody saw her. Then she got onto her chaise lounge and removed her top.

I was tempted to go over and tell her she really got her money's worth on the boob job. I mean, she laid flat, but they didn't. However, I thought that might not be proper behavior.

I saw one guy immediately turn his chair so he was looking away, clearly so he wouldn't have to keep trying to not look at her. I simply kept trying not to be seen looking at her. The women on the beach spent a lot of time furtively talking to one another.

Two points (no pun intended):

1. Nudity on this particular beach is technically illegal. You don't see it often. I do not know if any arrests, though.

2. Taking a pic would definitely have not been appropriate. Sorry. Not sorry for you guys. Sorry for me.
Click to expand...
Where the hell are you?
Click to expand...
Anguilla. I suspect she was one of the day-trippers who come over from St. Maarten/St. Martin. There are nude beaches there.
 
Originally posted by Lone Clone:


Originally posted by Hawk in SEC Country:


Originally posted by Lone Clone:
Yesterday at the beach, a young woman with a spectacular body and a very small bikini paraded around for awhile to make sure everybody saw her. Then she got onto her chaise lounge and removed her top.

I was tempted to go over and tell her she really got her money's worth on the boob job. I mean, she laid flat, but they didn't. However, I thought that might not be proper behavior.

I saw one guy immediately turn his chair so he was looking away, clearly so he wouldn't have to keep trying to not look at her. I simply kept trying not to be seen looking at her. The women on the beach spent a lot of time furtively talking to one another.

Two points (no pun intended):

1. Nudity on this particular beach is technically illegal. You don't see it often. I do not know if any arrests, though.

2. Taking a pic would definitely have not been appropriate. Sorry. Not sorry for you guys. Sorry for me.
Click to expand...
Where the hell are you?
Click to expand...
Anguilla. I suspect she was one of the day-trippers who come over from St. Maarten/St. Martin. There are nude beaches there.
Click to expand...
Well I've got my next vacation planned.
 
Went back to the beach today. She was there, dressed. Mrs. LC and I set up our chairs nearby -- not because of her, but because of the shade situation. She (the blonde, not Mrs. LC) immediately took off her top.

Mrs. LC and I had all we could do not to giggle.

A bit later, she (the blonde, not Mrs. LC) got up, stretched, and walked down to the water, swam for awhile. I said to Mrs. LC, should I take a picture? She (Mrs. LC, not the blonde) says why not, she obviously wants to be seen. So I get out the camera. The blonde gets out of the water and -- you won't believe this -- jogs back to her chaise lounge.

I took no photo. Couldn't figure out how to put it in video mode. Mrs. LC confirms my belief that real ones NEVER act like that.

If she (the blonde, not Mrs. LC) is there tomorrow, I promise to take a picture. Then I'll need advice on how to make it available to HROT. C
 
I would stare at them until she objected, then say "hey you are the one who hung them out to dry not me".
 
Proper protocol...snap a pic with cell phone & post on HROT. Should not have task such a silly question BTW.
 
Originally posted by moxyfruvous:
Proper protocol...snap a pic with cell phone & post on HROT. Should not have task such a silly question BTW.
Click to expand...
Couldn't get it past the dread banhammer. Would have to put it online somewhere and link to it.
 
If you see someone driving down the street in a classic car it isn't rude to stare. The owner is proud of it. By the same logic if a woman has a tasteful rack installed and she offers them for public viewing there is no reason to feel bad about a prolonged stare.
 
I would have provided her with a batch of Dr. HawkinMN's white swimming lotion.
 
Originally posted by SalAunese:
I'm surprised you didn't jack off on her
Click to expand...
Different strokes for different folks. Not everybody would do what you would do.
 
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