It’s pretty apparent that all of our kids were/are academic Doogie Howsers and athletically Mahomes/Christian McCaffery.
Ever have a kid repeat a grade?
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Wow, great responses and perspectives from all sides here. Much appreciated! I think we're leaning hold him back but still have some time to consider.
If I ever told anyone in this thread to GFY, I take it back.
If I ever told anyone in this thread to GFY, I take it back.
Seriously? For an advantage in sports? If so, That s just ridiculous.
I wish more parents would do this to be honest. It's frustrating for the teachers and the kids, often, when parents start their kids too early. I don't know your child but it is pretty obvious when a kindergarten class comes in at the start of the year and you can tell which couple of kids should have waited another year.
If you're going to do it, do it now, imo. Your kid is too young to really understand or internalize any negatives and generally the kid thrives the following year...both academically and athletically. The friend thing is a concern because I wouldn't want him to go through elementary school with the same group of kids who are forming an opinion about him...it can be difficult to change that without forcing friends groups, for example.
Whatever you decide, make sure the next teacher and building principal understand your concerns and that you are here to advocate for your kid.
I was 18 for a couple weeks before I graduated and was the 2nd youngest in my class. The difference physically after a year was astounding. I wish my mom would have made me the oldest in my class for sure.
In my early years, I was doing extremely well so me and a few others were advanced to the next grade. Starting 4th grade, the school board for some reason put a stop to that and we had to go back to out original class. I got bored and lazy and my grades weren't nearly as good the rest of my school years as they had been.
He repeated 7th grade and had a great time and no problems.
His only real challenge came because we were transferred back to Dallas and his friends found out he was now in a grade behind them. They gave him a hard time but he decide to make friends at his new grade. He was still one of the bigger kids until his senior year when most of the guys had mostly caught up.
Academically it was always a solid decision.
He graduated college Magna cum Laude in Finance/Economics, has two Master’s Degrees and is the CFO of a large hospital health system. It worked well for him.
Sports holdbacks are a huge deal in Texas. At least when my kids were in school.
Some suburban high schools in Texas have 1500-1700 kids in a class and thus you would have maybe 150-175 boys trying out for the baseball team. Older kids would have an advantage or so it was thought until every kid was a holdback. It was a good plan against some of the inner city schools who struggled to get kids who could afford the time and equipment to play after school sports.
Late August birthday checking in. My parents put me in early. I was the youngest kid in class. I think it hurt me in some ways. I was always the smallest kid so I didn't excel at sports. When the coach would move me down a grade to travel I was a great player. Because of this all of my friends were in the grade below me which was fine, some of them were even older than I was but I would get made fun of because of it. I grew 6" after high school which was a shocker to all my classmates when they saw me 20 years later. Nobody recognized me.
My middle son is a late July birthday. He was in Montessori in Kindergarten and tested very high so we moved him into 1st grade. He's one of the youngest in his class. Most of his friends and the stars on his grades teams are over a year older than him. He is, like I was, one of the smallest kids in class. He is one of the smartest kids but I think the sports aspect is more important to him. Now he's a Freshman and he isn't playing any sports because he's just not the same caliber. But if he was in 8th grade he would be a starter in every sport and maybe even be a star.
We have friends that have held their kids back a year so they would excel at sports but we don't feel it's that important.
My middle son is a late July birthday. He was in Montessori in Kindergarten and tested very high so we moved him into 1st grade. He's one of the youngest in his class. Most of his friends and the stars on his grades teams are over a year older than him. He is, like I was, one of the smallest kids in class. He is one of the smartest kids but I think the sports aspect is more important to him. Now he's a Freshman and he isn't playing any sports because he's just not the same caliber. But if he was in 8th grade he would be a starter in every sport and maybe even be a star.
We have friends that have held their kids back a year so they would excel at sports but we don't feel it's that important.
I was a bigger kid as it was. Otherwise i dont know if it really mattered much going to a smaller school. Pretty much you wanted to go out for a sport and you were on the team.
I wouldnt be surprised if my son has more people in his class than were in my entire high school
In NJ, Oct 1 is the cut-off. My son missed it by a few weeks so he couldn’t start kindergarten until he was almost 6. He did pre-k twice because he wasn’t allowed to start kindergarten. He’s academically advanced so we thought about having him test out of kindergarten and “skip” that year. But then he’d be the youngest in class and he’d graduate at 17. I hated those options so we kept him where he was; it was the right move.
I also looked at it like this: I like my kids living with me and I didn’t want to have him leave home a year early. Life is hard enough and I didn’t want to have him moving out before he turns 18.
I also looked at it like this: I like my kids living with me and I didn’t want to have him leave home a year early. Life is hard enough and I didn’t want to have him moving out before he turns 18.
The Texas town we were in while my son was that age had most of the boys "red-shirting" kindergarten. Most kids went to a private kindergarten and the tested into the more desired public kindergarten the 2nd year. I'd say about 75% of the kids in his class handled it this way. My son has a late June birthday and it was the right choice for him. There really is no downside unless they are held back in another upper grade. At that point you'd be getting really old in some cases. If that is happening there are probably other bigger problems to deal with. Good luck!
My thoughts as a former lower elementary teacher are that boys especially benefit from a little more time to mature. Girls tend to be more ready for the kind of things expected in a classroom so the adjustment is usually easier for them. I say that because typically boys tend to enjoy more rambunctious physical activities while girls are often content to color, cut, create, etc. It's harder for boys to adjust to sitting and working quietly. Of course these are stereotypes and there are exceptions both ways. I think holding a child back in order to mature is a good idea if the parent and/or teacher thinks it will be beneficial.
My parents basically double redshirted me before kindergarten…I was 19.5 when I graduated high school and look at the amazing heights that has taken me to!
It's not about this. Being good at sports inspires confidence in kids. It aids them in their social development. If you look at it from that perspective, it makes sense.
That's true, but there are also benefits from realizing your strengths and weaknesses. Bench warmers benefit from participating in sports too even if they are never stars.
Our son was sort of a tweener in terms of age, and he initially went to a montessori kindergarten. He did fine there, but we concluded that he wasn't quite emotionally mature enough for first grade, so we enrolled him in kindergarten at our parish school. Now, parish school kindergarten is decidedly NOT montessori kindergarten in terms of its educational methods. So Jr would come home each day, and we'd ask, "how was school today?" He would invariably reply "bad for me, good for Mrs. Butler."
He ended up a very well rounded, classically educated aerospace engineer (born on the anniversary of the moon landing).
He ended up a very well rounded, classically educated aerospace engineer (born on the anniversary of the moon landing).
There are lots of ways that kids can be aided in social development.
Being 1-2 years older than everyone else in your class isn't doing that.
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My daughter is August baby and she is the youngest. We started her but considered holding back to allow her to gain a year of maturity, that extra year might help her social anxiety, shyness etc. But her friend group from preschool had some transition to K as a group so felt like her circle of friends was a great asset. Now that we moved that reasoning no longer adds value and she is back to being the youngest (but one of the tallest). I think she will struggle with her shyness regardless so it may or may not have mattered.
This was me. I am a June birthday and my parents decided I needed more seasoning before starting kindegarten. So, I was always the oldest kid in my grade. It worked out rather well with sports, having another year to physically develop, although it did suck at times for little league and such when I was playing with kids a grade older. But, I got used to it and made it easier with football when I played with the sophomores as a freshman, and varisty as a sophomore. Yes, that was a humble brag.
Really depends on the kid. I had an early september birthday and was always the youngest. It sucked.
On the other hand I was a smart kid and was always bored in class which led to other issues.
Not sure I would have done better staying back a year, but who can say.
On the other hand I was a smart kid and was always bored in class which led to other issues.
Not sure I would have done better staying back a year, but who can say.
My oldest is 10 and a June birthday, one of the youngest in his grade. My family is notorious for early development so we thought it’d be weird if he hit puberty way before everyone if we held him back. I was a late birthday and one of the earliest to develop, would have been weird being another year ahead. He’s plenty fine intellectually, one of the highest in his class. Basketball is a bit tough on him but he does okay. Baseball is his sport, he plays at his grade level in league and is an older kid on his travel team. That balance has really helped him see things from both ends.
Younger son is a late may birthday and also one of the youngest. His early start was more of a decision for us because he was a little more immature early on but has done fine. Physically even being younger he is one of the bigger, more athletic kids so that’s been good for him. He technically would have been a 6u baseball player and subbed for his brothers 10u league team twice and went 3/3 with 3 base hits and 3 walks. He usually plays sports in the yard with 4th-6th graders so that’s really been a benefit to him.
We don’t have any regrets and will do the same with our daughter who turns 3 in June.
Younger son is a late may birthday and also one of the youngest. His early start was more of a decision for us because he was a little more immature early on but has done fine. Physically even being younger he is one of the bigger, more athletic kids so that’s been good for him. He technically would have been a 6u baseball player and subbed for his brothers 10u league team twice and went 3/3 with 3 base hits and 3 walks. He usually plays sports in the yard with 4th-6th graders so that’s really been a benefit to him.
We don’t have any regrets and will do the same with our daughter who turns 3 in June.
Just remember that if you hold them back, that is one more year of having a teenager in your house.
Maybe. He’s a freshman now, and the class he could have been in has some really good athletes. My son is a QB and PG, and loves BB. The class ahead of him has a kid who’s 6 ft 7 or better who’s dad played in the NBA. I don’t lose any sleep over it and he’ll obviously get to play with them at the varsity level so it’s not that big of a deal, just something I think about occasionally.
Just think of it as him getting more space to maximize his development for when he links up with the them playing varsity.
As yall know, HSFB is king in Texas. With that being said, a lot of schools will RS students who show they have some athletic ability. Quinn Ewers is an example from my former district 😊
