Gee, I can't imagine why.....
https://www.cnbc.com/2019/05/17/60p...say-theyre-uncomfortable-mentoring-women.html
https://www.cnbc.com/2019/05/17/60p...say-theyre-uncomfortable-mentoring-women.html
60% of Senior Male Managers are Uncomfortable Mentoring Women
- Thread starter JRHawk2003
- Start date
I saw an interview with Facebook COO Sheryl Sandberg and she said this was "totally unacceptable" and placed the blame/burden entirely on the men in this situation. It was totally their fault according to her. It made me happy that I had sold my Facebook stock in the recent run-up.
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Jfc. This explains why the Incel numbers are growing. Did nobody teach these “men” how to talk to a woman respectfully without hitting on them?
As a manager. I would never ever have a closed door meeting with one. Unless there was a video recording. All it would take is one accusation in this climate to end your career.
There people are clueless:
“That’s one way to create equal access,” says Thomas. “I don’t fully understand it, but for whatever reason if a man is also uncomfortable having a one-on-one meeting with a woman or working with a woman, then leave the door open.”
Like I said....clueless.
There people are clueless:
“That’s one way to create equal access,” says Thomas. “I don’t fully understand it, but for whatever reason if a man is also uncomfortable having a one-on-one meeting with a woman or working with a woman, then leave the door open.”
Like I said....clueless.
Maybe I am not following your viewpoint but are you concerned that you will say something that could be perceived inappropriate or are you concerned about a false allegation?
If the latter then I think you are being way too paranoid.
I know, I read it. My point was that this points to a bigger problem of men either not knowing how to talk to women or being uncomfortable with it which is leading to increasing numbers of Incels.
I’m not trying to say that male managers shouldn’t avoid some situations but those are few and far between in my experience.
You are literally putting your career in the hands of a young woman if you meet with her 1 on 1. That is insane. Too much to risk.
I always treated male and female employees equally, and was sure to schedule weekly meetings with all of them to go over objectives, etc. That said, I definitely watched how I presented things to females differently to males, and paid attention to my body language more when one on one with female employees. Same thing with my gay employees.
These movements weren't a thing when I was managing large teams, but I still understood that there were things that could be more sensitive to people in certain classes than others, so I stayed in my lane and attempted to eliminate subjectivity in evaluations as much as possible.
I'd be more concerned now than I was 7-8 years ago, and I totally understand why men would be more hesitant to do 1 on 1 meetings/dinners with female employees now. However, this is almost entirely dependent on the individual employee, and I think for the most part a good manager knows which employees may be at risk of reporting things that aren't there vs. those who won't.
These movements weren't a thing when I was managing large teams, but I still understood that there were things that could be more sensitive to people in certain classes than others, so I stayed in my lane and attempted to eliminate subjectivity in evaluations as much as possible.
I'd be more concerned now than I was 7-8 years ago, and I totally understand why men would be more hesitant to do 1 on 1 meetings/dinners with female employees now. However, this is almost entirely dependent on the individual employee, and I think for the most part a good manager knows which employees may be at risk of reporting things that aren't there vs. those who won't.
I never had a problem mentoring women when I was still working, but I had a couple of friends who did have problems that were unearned regarding a female direct report. I am glad I am done given the current state of affairs (pun not intended). One would have to be even more careful now, imo.
False allegation. If you are in the same room as a woman alone, all it takes is an allegation.
I don't think that's paranoia in the least. Maybe 90% of women wouldn't do it. But if 10% will and this woman is part of that 10% it can ruin you. Say you have to fire her later on for some reason, or say you promote someone else but her. All she has to do to get a big settlement from a company that doesn't want it's name ruined is to say that she wasn't promoted or she was fired because she refused to have sex with you.
If you are in a room alone with her and the door shut, she controls the narrative of what happened in that room.
When my wife was pregnant I went to some of her OB appointments. If the doctor was a male when he was doing any procedure he ALWAYS brought in a nurse to be in the room with him. The female doctors didn't do this. Why do you think this is? (And we saw a rotating group of doctors we saw about 5 different male OB's and 3 or 4 female ones. This happened every single time without exception.)
Doctors already know they need a 3rd party witness and it's par for the course. But a manager in a business you call paranoid for wanting the same thing.
I can't believe that women expect to be treated with respect and not be hit on or harassed by their bosses. Unreasonable bitches.
To be fair having my vagina examined by a male doctor is a tiny bit different than having a meeting about a project with my male boss.
Regardless it's still the same concept. If she says you were up to something you were not suppose to be doing as part of your medical duties you better have a witness there to refute her. And again only the male doctors did this. Female doctors would just go straight ahead and do it with no witnesses.
Ever wonder why they call it "credibly accused". That's because there is no real evidence of what happened there, the credible part is that they can place the two of you in the same place at the same time where it MIGHT have happened. That's all it takes to be "credibly accused" and credibly accused typically means you are presumed guilty.
This wreaks of paranoia.
Your example is SOP for that situation (as it should be) and where I work we have a similar policy for people who come in for meetings.
Dude, at this point there is an article or a poll that can confirm any thought (or feeling) anybody has. Everybody knows you've had some bad luck with women, or a woman.
I don't think it's paranoia to want a 3rd party present at all times or the door open at least, no matter what the situation is. That just makes sense.
Me thinks Ol' JR is a bit frightened of the broads.
Lol right....What was your phrase in the other thread?? Something like "Gentle creatures, blah blah blah...."??
I have no problems mentoring women. Closed door meetings are no problem either.
These things are not difficult.
These things are not difficult.
Historically-speaking, I think the evidence bears out that men are more prone to violence (especially against women), especially violence at scale.
When it comes to the abortion issue, I do believe men should not be legislating this. This issue reveals to us how deeply ingrained patriarchy remains in our society.
I think we should kick all the women out of the meetings when military issues come up and decisions about if we are going to war. Unless of course that woman served of her own free will, since she never even signed up for the draft. Because women don't sign up for the draft if they havn't served they shouldn't be making decisions on the issue.
Which means by logic no woman could be president without first serving in the military.
If we're going to apply the "men shouldn't be legislating" standard lets apply it to women too.
Of course we could just forget about the gender of the people and argue the point on it's merits. That way women who havn't served in the military could still be president.
Know the appropriate boundaries for every situation. It ain’t that hard.
I’ve worked for and supervised women and men. You treat them all like human beings. When it came to discipline, I always had a witness for those conversations, no matter if it was a woman or man.
There's definite risk. If the job ultimately doesn't work out for her, any negative statement that can end with ..."because I'm a woman" will receive serious attention. And it doesn't matter how the man acts.
If she wants to take you down with her, it's not hard to make happen.
Act like a prick? You're picking on them because they're a woman.
Too nice? Patronizing them because they're a woman.
Completely indifferent? Not interested because they're a woman.
Help them up after they fall down? Think they are too weak to do it by themselves because they're a woman.
This isn't even including how your looks towards them can be construed.
If she wants to take you down with her, it's not hard to make happen.
Act like a prick? You're picking on them because they're a woman.
Too nice? Patronizing them because they're a woman.
Completely indifferent? Not interested because they're a woman.
Help them up after they fall down? Think they are too weak to do it by themselves because they're a woman.
This isn't even including how your looks towards them can be construed.
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Nobody cares about that stuff if you don’t already have a history of shady behavior and an HR file two inches thick.
I’d also add that not drinking heavily around (or with) co-workers eliminates 95% of the risk.
What? You know how badly false accusations hurt people in the public eye? The old front page news/ back page retraction effect has hurt a lot of people.
It's not most women by any means but there are enough women with this attitude that you have to look out for yourself.
I think it's a little off to be uncomfortable mentoring someone. But that is only because mentoring can happen in public. But I wouldn't meet with a woman other than my wife alone.
When they happen, they can hurt. Ok.
They don’t happen so often that male managers should be afraid of managing female employees.
I can't say what they are for "the real world," but in academic medicine and research, the number of women mentoring men is certainly on the rise. And, frankly, I don't think anybody thinks twice about it.
I mentored two young women and a third calls me up and hits me up for advice and wants into my profession. I have avoided her calls pretty much. I won't do it again.
