Can someone explain why childless, single working women is a bad thing?
- Thread starter Hawki97
- Start date
Because as I said before, you are making the assumption that immigration will continue ad infinitum. If that dries up for any reason be it lifestyles improving in their home countries or political issues or lifestyles not improving here or lifestyles improving in other countries more than they improve here making them preferred destinations for immigrants than we are in trouble.
When do you expect that will be? And what about my question concerning what needs to be done now?
I believe the blinders are on the person that thinks someone is selfish for making the life decision to not have children because it doesn't fit in with what they want in their life.
My wife and I tried to have kids for years. Now at 48 and 45 we know it wasn't meant to be. Does that make us selfish?
Seriously, where my life is at now at 48 I am thankful I never had kids. I know I would have felt differently if I had kids probably.
Dogs are cheaper and don't turn into teenagers. While we are not rich as we both are teachers, we can do almost anything we want.
I look at my friends. They never have a weekend off. They are traveling somewhere for basketball, hockey, dance, etc.
Seriously, where my life is at now at 48 I am thankful I never had kids. I know I would have felt differently if I had kids probably.
Dogs are cheaper and don't turn into teenagers. While we are not rich as we both are teachers, we can do almost anything we want.
I look at my friends. They never have a weekend off. They are traveling somewhere for basketball, hockey, dance, etc.
No, I'm not. You're creating non-existent scenarios. You're flailing badly.
I'm about 99% sure you would choose a life with children vs your current life.
Your life might be great, I'm not saying it isn't, but having/raising kids is the greatest joy one will ever have.
PS I'm sorry you weren't able to have children. It's sad that many can't no matter how hard they try and then you have others that have many unplanned pregnancies.
Sorry I missed that question been trying to reply to so many.
As for when immigration dries up, I don't know. But a lot of factors that are beyond our control go into that. We can not always count on being a destination for immigrants. A lot of countries that used to give us immigrants by the millions improved their conditions in their home countries and very few people immigrate from those countries anymore. Ireland and Germany being two big ones. Who is to say that Latin America doesn't get it's act together and people choose to stay there?
As far as what should be done now. The economic aspects are the easiest increases in the child tax credit, daycare assistance, paid family leave.
Cultural are going to be a bit tougher but I would suggest a more family focused culture. People should see themselves more in the lens of being part of a family. Your family should be a bigger part of who you are. I don't know how we can do that. . . it might honestly be a pandora's box that's already been opened.
The problem is that what they want in their life is often selfish things. The people who are having the least children are the people who are most economically able to care for them.
So it's almost like once people get a taste for having money the only thing they wish to do with that money is expand upon that.
Society wise it is.
You need a birth rate of 2.1 children per woman roughly to keep the population the same without relying on immigration.
I think Hoosier wants The Handmaid’s Tale to be a documentary.
Again, it's a made up scenario. We're a country built on immigration. It's not going to suddenly dry up. That's absurd.
I support the child tax credits, daycare assitance and paid family leave - to take care of our existing children and families. Not as incentive to have more children.
We are also a country of choice and freedom. Your "should" does not apply to everyone, nor should it any more than someone else telling you to have no children.
GFY and this blanket statement. Your desire to control what other people do with their lives is abhorrent.
No I want more people to make the choice to have more children. I want both a government that encourages that and a culture that encourages that.
I'm 100% a no go for anyone being forced to have children. As forcing people to have children has bigger ethical problems to it than the ethical problems facing us if we have a population collapse.
However people don't make their decisions in a vacuum. They make them based on economics and culture. Right now people are both economically and culturally discouraged from having children.
Economically because it is too expensive and culturally because our culture has become extremely individualized.
Are you suggesting that when I struck up conversation with my now (no pics) wife back at age 29 I should have walked the other way because she was single and childless?
I think Hoosier is talking about white couples having more white babies because they are more likely to "contribute" to the white society and culture.
He hasn't come right out and said that but sure seems to point that way.
You need to stop making assumptions about others based on YOUR life. We have a viable solution to a falling population. If you foresee a reason for that to fail, the logical response would be to figure out what. We have the very best institutions of higher learning in the world AINEC. We can brain-drain the world but we then have to make this country an inviting place to stay. Screaming about the death of our culture is probably a bad choice.
Again I am not advocating nor do I want anyone forced to have children That has bigger ethical problems than a population collapse would create.
I want economic and cultural incentives to do so. Right now both disincentivise having children.
If you want kids, have kids, if you don't, don't.
I do laugh at the gross ass ladies that have started the trend of thinking they are too good to settle down when everyone in the world realizes they are just a walking defense mechanism.
I do laugh at the gross ass ladies that have started the trend of thinking they are too good to settle down when everyone in the world realizes they are just a walking defense mechanism.
They don't make decisions just on economics and culture - that is you making up scenarios again. They make their decisions for a myriad of reasons. And those who choose not to have children, for whatever reason, don't deserve to be called selfish.
What's much more apparent is your selfishness to get subsidies for the choices you made.
This is exactly what I've been saying. You have a problem with how other people live their lives because they're doing what THEY want to do with THEIR time, money, etc and because you don't agree with it, you think it's selfish. And that's fine, you're allowed to have your own opinion, but there's a reason barely anyone on here is backing you.
There's been many threads on here over the years about having children, abortion, etc and in every thread it's like your role is to pretend it's 1960 again.
No. You didn't it right, although 29 is creeping into the late marrying category. Not quite there but it's on the border. Glad things worked out for ya.
I don't think people migrating from the US to other countries will help the issue being discussed.
Our culture is very pro having children. Just look at FB, most of the posts are people sharing every small milestone their children/grandchildren experience. I'm all for the government giving addition breaks to families with children, but I'm not for shaming people who do not have children.
I love kids. They are great. I spent 34 years of my life teaching young children basic skills and personal responsibility. I'm just opposed to the idea that people without children for one reason or another are not contributing to society.
We get it - you want the money and you want the people to go to church. Now that's selfish.
In what way does American culture disincentivize having children?
Hoosier-you are in the minority here. I know you are pretty religious and two(?) of your kids are on the spectrum? I am sure it has something to do with it.
The 50's and 60's had some lessons we can learn from for both things we should try to do and things we shouldn't try to do.
The racism and sexism from that time should be things we learn to not repeat.
However at that time most children were being raised with fathers in the home, they had access to either good job opportunities out of high school or affordable college education. They would also have access to affordable housing. We were building our population and expanding our standard of living both economically and technologically. We also had a good sense of community both locally and nation-wide. Our politics at the time was mostly tame save for people like Joseph McCarthy trying to destroy people's lives for political points. (Something we should not repeat by not making the dumber douchier version of McCarthy named Donald Trump president)
IDK if my kids being on the spectrum has much to do with it but I have my bias like anyone. Religious belief could be a part of it.
I would say a bigger bias may come from having an intact family growing up (My parents have been married for 44 years) and being married to my own wife for 14 years.
I don’t know…do illegal immigrants get social security cards? Don’t you need to become an American citizen first, before getting a SS card?
The same choices are being made in every culture on the planet. Women do not want to spend most of their adult lives with children. Where they can get an education and have access to birth control, they run the show. You’re not going to change that with whatever incentives you care to pass out.
