Dating

[SSG T]

My wife and I dated for 2 weeks while I was on leave, then dated while I was PCS'ing (permanent change of station) to Ft Carson, got engaged before I left, then got married the next OCT right before I left for Iraq.

So, we met summer of 89, got engaged Nov 89, married OCT 90, and spent around a month together total.

Been together ever since.

 

[Whatsgoingonwitgyouguys0190]

Chris'sDominantDaddy442

K, so he’s a dom I guess, are you a cuck then?

 

[Hondo_11]

K, so he’s a dom I guess, are you a cuck then?

You don't read so well, huh....or is your "cage" too tight?

 

[Whatsgoingonwitgyouguys0190]

You don't read so well, huh....or is your "cage" too tight?

ah my bad, but who is Chris?

 

[Hondo_11]

ah my bad, but who is Chris?

Chris the whack job that's usually running around here like the Tazmanian Devil.

 

[Whatsgoingonwitgyouguys0190]

Chris the whack job that's usually running around here like the Tazmanian Devil.

Never heard of him

 

[nolesincebirth]

Forever single. Wish I can figure out why most guys just don’t like chicks with dicks.
Rather vexing.

I imagine you’re swimming in a small dating pool. Honest question, do you find gay men are mostly after you? Straight guys with a little edge? HORTers? I’ve never really thought of it but I’m not sure what the targeted crowd is.

 

[nolesincebirth]

I’m happily married for almost 15 years. I have a great marriage and family. Very happy. But if something happened and I ended up single, I don’t foresee ever getting in another relationship. I don’t think I’d have it in me.

 

[HawkFan1298]

I’m happily married for almost 15 years. I have a great marriage and family. Very happy. But if something happened and I ended up single, I don’t foresee ever getting in another relationship. I don’t think I’d have it in me.

Why not?

Just curious.

 

[nolesincebirth]

Why not?

Just curious.

Just speculating because I’m not (and hope to never be) in that position but I’m not having any more kids. I’m mid-40s and pretty well set in my own ways. The idea of having to date, start over, and go through all that effort just doesn’t sound appealing to me. I’d likely devote all my attention to my kids and, when they are out of the house, could easily entertain myself. I’d probably buy a sailboat and set sail.

 

[HawkeyeGenius]

After being married and having kids for years, I'd imagine dating would be the least of my concerns if we ever split up.

 

[McLovin32]

35 years old, never married, no kids here.

Dating has been pretty fun over the last 5ish years. Fooled around with quite a few chicks that we're 8-10 years younger than me. Nothing serious.

With that said I've found a girl that's 34 and we've been serious for about the last 5 months. It's been good. Kinda miss the dating part, kinda don't.

No pics of any chick mentioned.

 

[WhiteSoxClone]

Yup, single guy here. I‘m 32, no kids, and never been married.

I have zero plans/desire of ever getting married. I was never super into relationships but finally tried one, my first, when I was 26. When her and I broke up I basically confirmed my own beliefs that I like being single and have no desire for another relationship. Four years later and I have not so much as had the slightest crush on anyone. I just enjoy the single life.

I absolutely thought that I would never get married also. Then I met my wife when I was 32 and she was 28. Two years of dating, 15 years of marriage, and three kids later, I couldn’t be happier. You just never know. Sometimes it just takes meeting the right person.

 

[Morrison71]

I have been married 20 years in a couple months. My wife is a saint for putting up with my dumbass that long. But I can not imagine dating in today’s world. I really feel for you single folks, I couldn’t do it.

 

[Joes Place]

Any other non-married HORT'ers on here? Dating kind of sucks folks. I've met a few ladies and they have ranged from psycho to super possessive to weird as hell. Anyone got horror stories? You know you do.

I think U should start a website/dating company for old people.

www.carbondating.com

 

[pink shizzle]

I absolutely thought that I would never get married also. Then I met my wife when I was 32 and she was 28. Two years of dating, 15 years of marriage, and three kids later, I couldn’t be happier. You just never know. Sometimes it just takes meeting the right person.

Totally true. As usual, at Christmas this year my aunts asked me if I have a special lady in my life. I proceeded with telling them how I like being single BUT said if the right woman came along I wouldn't just ignore her. I completely agree with you.

 

[WhiteSoxClone]

Totally true. As usual, at Christmas this year my aunts asked me if I have a special lady in my life. I proceeded with telling them how I like being single BUT said if the right woman came along I wouldn't just ignore her. I completely agree with you.

I should have added though, that I also have no doubts I could have had a happy life if I’d stayed single. You should not feel any pressure if you don’t meet the right person. I know enough people who would be happier if they’d never gotten married instead of marrying the wrong person because marriage was what they thought they were supposed to do when they hit a certain age. The bachelor life definitely has its appeal too.

 

[cfbfan23]

With that said I've found a girl that's 34 and we've been serious for about the last 5 months.

Serious = doing anal

 

[TarponSpringsNole]

I imagine you’re swimming in a small dating pool. Honest question, do you find gay men are mostly after you? Straight guys with a little edge? HORTers? I’ve never really thought of it but I’m not sure what the targeted crowd is.

Lol. My post wasn’t serious.
But, yes. Small dating pool. Gay men aren’t interested in me at all. It’s guys who call themselves “straight” that are into me, and there’s a never ending supply. Many more men than you’d imagine, and they’re adept at keeping their sexual proclivities a secret.

 

[fredjr82]

It's a shit world shortly after 30. A majority of the good ones are taken by then. I was damn lucky to find a great girl who treats my kids awesome, we get along amazingly, never fight, etc. It's been 5 years this November. Still can't commit to marriage (it's a me thing) but I'd be crushed without her.

 

[bdg8]

Totally true. As usual, at Christmas this year my aunts asked me if I have a special lady in my life. I proceeded with telling them how I like being single BUT said if the right woman came along I wouldn't just ignore her. I completely agree with you.

In a few years they will start asking if you have a special person in your life

 

[Bank of Hawk]

After listening to my buddy this weekend talk about how he back to 3am booty calls with a gal who he slept with countless times over the past few years, while she is also dating other people, I too am glad to be out of the dating pool. Single women, the hot ones at least, always have a backup d so watch out.

 

[HawkFan1298]

It's a shit world shortly after 30. A majority of the good ones are taken by then. I was damn lucky to find a great girl who treats my kids awesome, we get along amazingly, never fight, etc. It's been 5 years this November. Still can't commit to marriage (it's a me thing) but I'd be crushed without her.

How about after 40? 😀

 

[fredjr82]

I'm 40 i

How about after 40? 😀

If you're really asking, hop on a dating app. You can still find great people out there. Is it harder then when we were 18-25? Absolutely. There are still great girls out there who just got the short stick of the dating/marriage world.

The real obstacles are that most 30+ at least have 1 kid. Whether they're yours or someone else's it can cause issues in relationships.

 

[HawkFan1298]

I'm 40 i

If you're really asking, hop on a dating app. You can still find great people out there. Is it harder than when we were 18-25? Absolutely. There are still great girls out there who just got the short stick of the dating/marriage world.

The real obstacles are that most 30+ at least have 1 kid. Whether they're yours or someone else's it can cause issues in relationships.

No thanks.

My Uncle's married never married women over 40 and they are just brutal. Admittedly, it's a small sample size.

 

[fredjr82]

No thanks.

My Uncle's married never married women over 40 and they are just brutal. Admittedly, it's a small sample size. )

Correct. At the end of the day nobody's perfect. Certainly some flaws, but we all have them. It's red flags you're looking for. At our age, red flags are deal breakers. We're lucky we don't have to settle

 

[HawkFan1298]

Correct. At the end of the day nobody's perfect. Certainly some flaws, but we all have them. It's red flags you're looking for. At our age, red flags are deal breakers. We're lucky we don't have to settle

Do you think if a woman is over 40 and has never been married yet WANTS to be married probably has huge flaws?

(Like mental illness, drug addiction, etc.)

 

[fredjr82]

Do you think if a woman is over 40 and has never been married yet WANTS to be married probably has huge flaws?

(Like mental illness, drug addiction, etc.)

No. Some of them? Sure. Hell, even a majority of them.

You have to remember how easy it is to start a side relationship these days with some "old flame". Some modern women just get F'd over by that time and time again. Women also aren't apt to jump right back in after something like that. So some just "slip through the cracks".

I was luck enough to find one of them. Is she perfect? No, but who is? She's like nobody I've ever met before.

 

[HawkFan1298]

No. Some of them? Sure. Hell, even a majority of them.

You have to remember how easy it is to start a side relationship these days with some "old flame". Some modern women just get F'd over by that time and time again. Women also aren't apt to jump right back in after something like that. So some just "slip through the cracks".

I was luck enough to find one of them. Is she perfect? No, but who is? She's like nobody I've ever met before.

Yeah.

I think dating is easier for women if they're average looking because they have men coming onto them all the time BUT they also have to deal with psychos and stalkers so not so much.

 

[fredjr82]

Yeah.

I think dating is easier for women if they're average looking because they have men coming onto them all the time BUT they also have to deal with psychos and stalkers so not so much.

Sure. For men though it gets easier as we both age. Sorry to the ladies of HROT, but men age better. When women are younger they normally date asswipes, the "bad boy" phase. After they get through that phase they're looking for someone who connects with then. It certainly helps to be good looking, charming, successful, etc (all of which I am) but women become much more accepting, as long as you treat them well, in their mid 30s

 

[HawkOptimist]

Been married and divorced twice. Have two young kids still at home. In my 40s. Don’t have much trouble dating. Have had lots of fun and met some great women along the way. Will never marry again. In no hurry to settle down either. Content the way things are. Still, kinda miss the stability and routine of a steady relationship sometimes.

 

[HawkFan1298]

Sure. For men though it gets easier as we both age. Sorry to the ladies of HROT, but men age better. When women are younger they normally date asswipes, the "bad boy" phase. After they get through that phase they're looking for someone who connects with then. It certainly helps to be good looking, charming, successful, etc (all of which I am) but women become much more accepting, as long as you treat them well, in their mid 30s

Yep.

Men age like wine and women age like milk.

 

[fredjr82]

Still, kinda miss the stability and routine of a steady relationship sometimes.

Here is the hard part. Casual sex is f'ing amazing for like 6 months. Then it just becomes....casual. No real feelings involved because its a different person every month. As a man I want to F most things that hove into my field of vison but I also want a connection when we're not banging. That can be difficult to find

 

[fredjr82]

Yep.

Some men age like wine and some women age like milk.

FYP. It can certainly go both ways.

Agreed you don't see older women with younger men, more often than older men with younger women but it's not 100% tilted that way

 

[Hondo_11]

Do you think if a woman is over 40 and has never been married yet WANTS to be married probably has huge flaws?

(Like mental illness, drug addiction, etc.)

Jesus H Keeeeyrist! This ^ right here, is the cheap entertainment that keeps me coming back! lol
Not withstanding the old adage, "crazy girls are insanely good in bed" being 100% true, why.....why in the name of Jupiter, would "mental illness" be an impediment to [this] bat shit crazy audience known as HROT? 🤣

Drug addiction? Not even going there! lol

No...I think the only issue with "dating" the stud muffins here have, is in reality, they couldn't get laid in a female prison with a pocketful of pardons! 🤣

I can hardly wait for the refutations from the global "swordsmen" in the house!

 

[Nole-4-Life]

I was divorced and single for about 5 years in my late 30s and early 40s. Dating was a crapshoot and almost not worth the hassle. I'd just go try to score a one night stand.

I was never going to get married again...then I met my now wife. We became friends first. Been together 17 years now and can't imagine life without her.

 

[HawkRugged17]

 

[hoks2415]

I was single for long periods in my 20's. My perspective was always that if the divorce rate is over 50%, it's probably safe to assume the percentage of truly happy, net positive relationships is probably around 20-25%.

While I was single, my approach was that I am happy single and will stay patient, play the field, and I'll be open to a permanent relationship/marriage if the right match comes along. I didn't really care if I found that at 30, 35, 40 or never.

Never minded dating, had a lot of good dates and flings. There are crazies, yes, but that's pretty easy to spot early on. The only time it can be stressful is if you become infatuated or vice versa and it's not a mutual feeling. Not easy to be on either side of that equation.

My present girlfriend and I have been together over a year and a half now and recently moved in together. She doesn't add stress to my life, there is mutual trust, and we're both emotionally intelligent. Probably the happiest I've ever been. Relationships are easy if you find the right person. I don't agree with the notion that relationships need to be a lot of work. It just feels natural.

 

[Hoosierhawkeye]

Happily married

And I do enjoy the fact that I don't have to worry about dating again. It's seriously a load off my shoulders to not have to try to impress women anymore.

I don't personally understand why anyone would want to be single for life. I mean certainly better than an abusive relationship I suppose but a healthy marriage is one of the best things that ever happened to me. It takes work but honestly I find it less work and more fulfilling then trying to get women to like me or want to date me.

 

[Hoosierhawkeye]

A lot can go wrong but then again some really beautiful stuff can occur too. I see happy families and am glad people get to experience that; it’s just not what (for the most part) I’ve wanted for myself.

Most relationships will end in breakup and I don’t know the stats on marriage but know it isn’t succeed at a great rate. That isn’t a reason for me not wanting kids or marriage but I understand it. I wish more kids were brought into the world in better situations With better chances to succeed.

While the divorce rate is way way too high I will point out that the divorce rate is inflated because that's a percent of all marriage that end in divorce. So what you get is a lot of people who have been married and divorced like 5 or 6 times driving up the stats.

If you look somewhere around 40% of first marriages end in divorce give or take a few percentage points.

Which means that 60% of first marriages fulfill "til death do us part"

Is 60% too low. YES. But it's also a majority.

Too many people bail on a relationship when times get tough. That’s what makes people who stay together stronger, they make it through the tough times together. All relationships have tough times and nobody is perfect.

This is absolutely true. You have to chose the marriage even when it sucks. Wife and I had some tough times that we got through too. Times when it might have been easy to quit. We mostly didn't quit because we didn't believe in quitting. We have had about 3 to 4 straight good years after having probably just as many bad years and I hope it stays this way forever but I'm also aware it might get tough again.