semi-hot take for coffee snobs

[bhawk24bob]

That is actually quite amusing. I am trying to think of the least appealing alternative name: Alabama masher cup?

I put my beans through the Newark Grinder every morning before I put them in the Baltimore Press

 

[stout1]

I put my beans through the Newark Grinder every morning before I put them in the Baltimore Press

Sounds like 2 things I have done to OP's mom.

 

[Tenacious E]

Sounds like 2 things I have done to OP's mom.

While the OP's mom jokes got tired a few years ago, that one is funny.

 

[the24fan]

OP is onto something. Here’s another hot take: coffee is overrated.

I like coffee alright, French press or pour over please. I generally even dislike the concept of “overrated” things, but people are just soooooo stoopid for coffee.

Agreed. If you spend over 5$ for coffee you’re a moron .
Anything Starbucks or caribou is a joke .

 

[cfbfan23]

Agreed. If you spend over 5$ for coffee you’re a moron .
Anything Starbucks or caribou is a joke .

 

[torbee]

French press is WAY overrated. My brother and his wife are the biggest food snobs I know. Like, they lived in Hoboken for 20 years (boston for a decade before that) and have literally eaten at all of the best restaurants in NYC numerous times, in every country you can think of, and they are foodies who have the time and money to cook food daily that could be served in nice restaurants (they are rich as f*ck, with no kids, and "retired" early). After spending the past 4 days with them, they grind beans every morning with a burr coffee grinder and use a french press to make coffee. Their times are down as is the coarseness of the grind, so I have to believe I was drinking the coffee as it was intended to be consumed. It was bitter/acrid, and much worse tasting than starbucks (they hate Starbucks and look down on it) and other quality drip coffees you make at home. csb.

I am not a big Starbucks fan, but their medium Pikes Peak roast made via Keurig is actually quite solid. It is my day-to-day drinker.

 

[BigDelHawk]

French press is WAY overrated. My brother and his wife are the biggest food snobs I know. Like, they lived in Hoboken for 20 years (boston for a decade before that) and have literally eaten at all of the best restaurants in NYC numerous times, in every country you can think of, and they are foodies who have the time and money to cook food daily that could be served in nice restaurants (they are rich as f*ck, with no kids, and "retired" early). After spending the past 4 days with them, they grind beans every morning with a burr coffee grinder and use a french press to make coffee. Their times are down as is the coarseness of the grind, so I have to believe I was drinking the coffee as it was intended to be consumed. It was bitter/acrid, and much worse tasting than starbucks (they hate Starbucks and look down on it) and other quality drip coffees you make at home. csb.

French press done right is fantastic, I like a blond roasted Espresso bean, ground course. That said, it is expensive as shit to drink. You fly through the beans with a French Press.

 

[torbee]

No offense but they don't have a f'ing clue as to what they are doing. Just because they are rich doesn't make them "intelligent." Coffee isn't for dimwits. It's a science and an art. If you want to know more about coffee and I mean MORE, like Ph.D. level shit, check this guy out. He is a freaking genius.

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The day you know more than James about coffee is the day you achieve Nirvana.

Another thing. You should note that even the best coffee, whether it is Kona or Jamaican Blue Mountain or Ethiopian spoils. Very very quickly. Coffee is an organic substance and evaporation and rancidation are very present. If your high roller relatives knew, if you buy coffee say from La Colombe or Espresso Vivace, the bag you receive clearly has the roast date and expiration date. This is finite and in the hands of an experienced barista and roaster, they could tell to the date when that bean was roasted.

If you want more mileage from your bean store your coffee in the freezer in a vac pack. That is what I do. That prevents evaporation and rancidation/oxidation of volatile oils. When I need to make coffee, I weigh the amount I need, bring it to room temperature, grind it in a ceramic burr grinder and brew. If I am making plain coffee, I use a French Press or Chemex Pour Over. If I making Espresso, Cappuccino, etc, I use machines. I have three. I am waiting for my 4th, a fully automatic Philips 5400, which guests can use without the learning curve.

And yes there's an art to even making a simple espresso.

If it hasn't sat in a massive glass carafe on a heating element for 4 to 8 hours, it ain't any good.

 

[torbee]

Here's a espresso (ristretto) shot I just pulled on a crap machine at home that cost less than a 100 bucks. Look at that crema. Easy if you know how.

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I crema'd your mamma last night!

 

[Chief Turkeyscratch]

Pretty much.

 

[OutbackBowl2017]

Starbucks and McDonalds coffee both suck. My go to is Dunkin in my Keurig with a splash of DD cream/sugar. Don’t like my coffee or women black. Sorry.